PDA

View Full Version : A Zergling Named Sex: The Map


EdvardMunch
08-15-2004, 10:07 AM
SEX! Now that I have your attention...

dis iz a c00l map n u shud paly it. n e Qs?????

Note: This is a very hard and story-oriented movie map. If you hate either of those then you should not watch this movie map and you should go back to b.net garbage like "New Avalon 2" and "The Blizzard Campaigns".



Frequently Asked Questions

1. wtf is this edward?

It's Edvard, and I'm glad you asked, very glad indeed. Next!

2. Answer my question.

A Zergling Named Sex is a short movie map based on the classic story "A Dog Named Sex" (which I will not provide a link to, otherwise you'll have no reason to play this map :) ) written by satirist Morty Storm.

3. Is it true this comes with spyware?

This was a nasty rumor that was started by a colleague of mine, Kazaa. It's company policy never to, imply ownership in the event of spyware... always use the indefinite article "a spyware", never "my spyware".

4. Do you have any reviews?

I wouldn't just send this out publicly with me being the only person who played it! Heck no! What kind of moron does that? :shiftyl: :shiftyr:
Because each reviewer had so much praise to give, I can only provide a blurb of their description of what one of them described as "a mind altering experience".
- Nahotnoj: "wtf? That was fucking..." (He was going to say brilliant, I swear)
- SiKawticPaladin: "Two thumbs up..." ("his ass" were not Paladin's next words, I swear)
- qPirateKing: no review (but that doesn't mean he didn't like it!)
- mrnooBdog: "wow edward dat wuz [the] shit"
- StealthyDeath: "You will not wake up tomorrow Munch." (Because it was that good, right?)
- Whiteknight: "This map is all my fault."
- My Mother: "That was really something, now excuse me while I vomit from joy again."

5. Do you have any screenshots of the map?

Yes I do!

http://themusicproject1.com/Screenie01.jpg

http://themusicproject1.com/Screenie02.jpg

6. Filesize and length?

It is 3.12 mega-bites and about 5 minutes long. It should take approximately 23 years to download using a standard 56k modem, assuming you don't lose your connection.

7. Where and how should I watch this?

In single-player mode, with the speed maxed out.

8. How do I know this isn’t a scream link?

Because I’d warn you ahead of time if it were.



Made by me, presented by the Starchitects (whether they want to admit it or not), and guaranteed to waste 5 minutes of your life and kill just as many brain cells, play "A Zergling Named Sex" right now!

Clicky clicky for movie movie! (http://www.starcraft.org/scums/maps.asp?mode=getfile&id=11721)

Dark_Soul74
08-15-2004, 11:26 AM
All I can saw is.....wow.

Nahotnoj
08-15-2004, 11:50 AM
Holy crap. that was the funniest waste of five minutes ever. two thumbs up... sidedown Edvard. two thumbs upsidedown.

Zeltaris
08-15-2004, 12:22 PM
-Death by bunnies
-BSTRhino Blackmail Map
-How to Mind Control ZeroDarkStar
-OMG TEH FA$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$TEST MONET EVARRRR!!!!!!!
-Death by bunnies
-Death by bunnies
-Death by bunniesOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG T3H L0L463!!!!!!![/annoying l33t speak]

Heh heh... do you really have such things Edvard? That was just rich... even better than map which I can't comment on 'cause it's still DLing... orange damn pink f***ing 56k connection... blue shit[/rant]

Nahotnoj
08-15-2004, 12:30 PM
am i the only one that noticed that the discription of the map said "starcaft 2 scenario" in that screenshot?

EdvardMunch
08-15-2004, 12:31 PM
Nah, I made 'em all up. I wouldn't be caught dead playing OMG TEH FA$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$TEST MONET EVARRRR!!!!!!! Besides, that name's so long it can't be a valid scenario.

Nahot, was that a positive or negative review? On the one hand you gave me karma (I think), on the other hand you said 2 thumbs upsidedown, on the third hand you said it was funny.

EDIT: Yeah, I noticed StarCraft 2 too when I took the screenshot. Fish me how that got in there. :rolleyes:

Zeltaris
08-15-2004, 12:45 PM
OMGOMMGOGMSFJSOMG! Tis m33n5 t3h 5C 2 is t3h k0m1n6 t3h 0u7!!!! 4nd EdwardM00nch is t3h d3v3l0p1n6 t3h 17!

Guess how long that took to write... ;)

EDIT: I've seen the map and It was just hilarious... the briefing > everything, tho :P

Spdstr
08-15-2004, 12:50 PM
Guess what, I actually thought that was good! I laughed more than I did on Tux's News map. I can't believe you havn't been arrested though you SICKO! lol, make more funny stuff ;).

Member,
~ Spdstr

Nahotnoj
08-15-2004, 12:57 PM
Nahot, was that a positive or negative review?

both.

I laughed more than I did on Tux's New's map. Tux has a new map?

EdvardMunch
08-15-2004, 1:17 PM
I think Tux's most recent, non-trailer map was "Kill Me!" which came out a few months ago.

StealthyDeath
08-15-2004, 2:01 PM
:o You will not wake up tomorrow Munch...

EdvardMunch
08-15-2004, 2:03 PM
Because it was that good, right?

StealthyDeath
08-15-2004, 2:15 PM
Right, it was that good. So good that I lost half of my brain cells. :D

UnHoly-Assassin
08-15-2004, 2:25 PM
cool i wanna have a dog named sex!

no im kidding....I AM!

Spdstr
08-15-2004, 3:00 PM
Nahotnoj, no I meant his "News Map". I accidently put the ' between the w and the s, sorry for any confusion ;). I changed it too.

Member,
~ Spdstr

P.S. You shoulda also said that you feel uncomfortable when sex is not in your house, in the divorce thing. lol

ZeroDarkStar
08-18-2004, 2:38 PM
"How to Mind Control ZeroDarkStar"

....







You will die in se7en days. And you'll get +Karma.

EDIT: I hate you, Karma System.

BSTRhino
08-19-2004, 1:01 AM
Man you're so funny Edvard...

It's been transferred to SC.org: http://www.starcraft.org/scums/maps.asp?mode=showdetails&id=11721

Gosh, the description on SC.org looks kinda wrong. Maybe it's the computer I'm using. I'll fix that up on the other comp.

EdvardMunch
08-19-2004, 1:55 AM
Yay! Thanks BST!

Heh, the contents of this thread are totally wrong for the SC.org description. This was just supposed to be a parody of other map release threads. I'd rather if this description were used please:

"This is the story of a man and the amusing social punishment he endures after he names his pet Zergling after everyone's favorite hobby: Sex.

Based on the story "A Dog Named Sex" by Morty Storm.

(Now comes in special, bite-sized movie map format!)"

By the by, the map size is 128x128. It's listed as 256x256.

Whiteknight
08-19-2004, 3:03 AM
Right, it was that good. So good that I lost half of my brain cells. :D This is all my fault. xD

Heh, I read that before, so it wasn't anything new. It was good for another laugh, though, and some accompanying motion. I still think your first post was funnier, especially that folder. :D