Demon_Child
02-17-2004, 4:46 AM
Another story written from the "Forum Symbiote" back at Blizzforums. Only 2 more 3 part stories, (Crimson Death & Deranged Evolution), a full novel (Return to Oblivion) and his unfinished story (The Lost Angels) to go before I will post the first few chapters to my "Demon Knight" 3-5 part story, 'Betrayal". :)
Hybrid Theory
Key
DC-Demon Child
TC-Tim-and-Carl
Shawn-ShawnManX
Garth-Garth_OneEye
PC99-Protosschick99
Ghost-Dark_Ghost3813
Chapter 1
A year has passed since the defeat of Yggdrasil and the 6 symbiotes Screech, Chaos, Mayhem, Maniac, Fury, and Terror. It’s Saturday night and the group is partying at Demon Child’s house for a change…
Garth-You’re not gonna beat me this time, DC!
DC-Give it up, Garth! You don’t have a chance of surviving this one!
Shawn-Look at Garth’s face! He’s gonna explode!
Garth-Ugh. Aw…damn! *feels his hand hit the table*
DC-Ha! Beat you! Who’s next?
PC99-*watching from a seat at the end of the table* What’s with you guys and arm wrestling? You’re all so ghetto, I swear. :D
Ghost-*reading a sci-fi magazine* Hey. I’m not ghetto. You are.
DC-Riiight. Who’s next?
Carnage-Me! *jumps down in the chair across from Demon Child*
DC-*snicker* This should be good for a laugh.
*They lock hands and slam their elbows on the table.*
Shawn-*counting* Ok. 1…2…3…GO!
*Demon Child and Carnage start arm wrestling*
DC-*smirking* You’re turning red, Carnage.
Carnage-Pffft. I’m always red, DC.
DC-*starts sweating* You can’t win. I’m a demon and you’re a smboite!
Carnage-*turns a brighter shade of red* It’s symbiote! S-y-m-b-i-o-t-e! What’s so hard about that!?
DC-*pushes Carnage’s hand closer to the table* Haha. You’re gonna lose.
Carnage-*straining* Tain’t…gonna…happen! *pushes Demon Child’s hand higher, but it comes back down*
*Carnage starts shaking*
Carnage-Ugh…er….mother…sonava!
DC-Told you! Just give up before you get hurt!
Carnage-……NEVER! *pushes harder in a last ditch effort*
*Carnage’s slimy hand slips out of grip while he tries to push DC’s hand up and smacks himself in the face. He topples over backwards in the chair and crashes on the floor.*
DC-*bursts into laughter* Hahahahahahaha. *tear*
*Everyone in the room laughs at Carnage’s accident.*
Carnage-Ha ha. Very funny. *stands up and brushes himself off with his tendrils* You owe me another round!
DC-Pffft. You wish.
*The door to Demon Child’s basement bursts open. Tim-and-Carl comes out. His face and hands are covered in grease.*
TC-*taking off goggles* I did it!
Shawn-Did what?
DC-What the hell were you doing in my basement?! I didn’t see you come in the front door.
TC-I came over a week ago and said I had to use your basement…
DC-What? I thought you left. I haven’t seen you since then!
Shawn-Hey. Hey. Comon! What did you do, Tim-and-Carl?
TC-Everyone downstairs! You gotta see this to believe it. It’s my greatest invention.
Carnage-I thought that water-powered go-cart was your greatest invention?
TC-It was…until I crashed into that old folks’ home. Remember?
Carnage-Oh yeah.
PC99-I remember that! It was horrible! Dentures and canes everywhere!
Ghost-Hehehe. That was a riot.
TC -Wasn’t it? Ok. Everyone in the basement.
DC-I swear, TC. If you messed up my basement...
*The Demon Knights all rush down the stairs to Demon Child’s basement. TC runs over to the side of a giant machine. It has a glass door and hundreds of cables hooked up to the ceiling. It constantly hums and a computer/ fax machine spits out paper with data on it.*
DC-What’s with all the cables!? No wonder the lights upstairs keep flickering!
TC-Sorry bout that. The work this machine does will be worth it. *steps over to a control panel*
Carnage-Wtf do you call this thing?
TC-I call it the Megagelic Interdimensional Kenetic Energy-converter.
Carnage-*blink*……….wtf do you call this thing?
TC-Er…I call it M.I.K.E.
Ghost-Fascinating.
PC99-That’s great, TC.
DC-I hate it. What the hell were you thinking?
TC-You don’t understand, guys! M.I.K.E. can, in theory, bring the dead back to life.
Carnage-Wow! So you mean, in theory, we could bring Julia Roberts back to life and ask her who blew her house up?
TC-…….
*Everyone stares at Carnage.*
Carnage-What?
TC-Actually, I thought we could use this thing to bring Redsoldier back to life.
*Everyone gasps*
DC-Now you’ve got my attention. Make it so, Number 1.
TC-Wait. I’m pretty sure this machine will only work ONCE, because the effects of the resurrection process will destroy all the circuits and equipment.
DC-Hmm…so this machine will only bring back 1 person and one person alone.
TC-Correct. Now, we could have a vote…
DC-Screw that! I’m the leader and I choose Redsoldier. Now get on it, greasemonkey.
TC-…Fine! *turns to the control panel and presses some buttons.* Ok. It’s begun. You might wanna run, now.
DC-What!?
TC-The machine WILL work, but the sonic boom in releases from opening the gate to the afterlife will destroy all living lifeforms within 15 feet.
DC-Ok. That’s about the size of my house.
TC-That’s my point. Now, if we could leave before the sonic boom…
Carnage-SONIC!? *runs up the basement stairs 2 at a time.*
TC-Exactly like that. Let’s go!
*The Demon Knights exit Demon Child’s house and gather on the front lawn outside.*
TC-*looking at his watch* 3…2…1…
*A huge blast of light escapes the house, and the sonic boom that follows breaks out all of Demon Child’s windows.*
DC-Damnit, TC!
TC-I might have miscalculated. My bad! *looks at his watch again.* 1…2…3…
*The light vanishes as fast as it came.*
TC-Everyone back in the house.
DC-You’re paying for those windows Tim-and-Carl!
*The Demon Knights return to the basement.*
Garth-Oh…I can’t believe my eyes.
TC-Yep. The machine’s fried beyond repair. *shakes head*
Garth-No…it’s Redsoldier! *points*
*The Demon Knights turn to see Garth pointing under the basement steps at Redsoldier.*
PC99-Red! You’re back!
Red-?enod syug uoy evah tahW
Carnage-Hehe. He’s talking funny talk.
TC-No, Carnage. I anticipated this. He’s been dead 3 years. He’s speaking backwards.
Carnage-Oh.
Shawn-I can help him. *walks over and smacks Red in the back of the head.*
Red-Hey! *pushes him* Wtf!? *comes out of the shadows under the basement steps.*
PC99-Aaaah! *covers her eyes*
DC-Oh, that’s just great. He’s nude. Carnage, pick up that box and give it to him so he can cover up.
Red-Garth!
Garth-*quickly stops looking* What?!
A few moments later, upstairs in Demon Child’s living room.
Red-Thanks for getting the clothes from my house, Carnage.
Carnage-Hey. No prob.
DC-Ok, Red. We’ve brought you up to speed. TC resurrected you with his M.I.K.E. machine.
Red-That still doesn’t explain this. *points to glowing ring above his head.*
DC-Oh…really? I didn’t notice that. I thought it was a…It’s a halo, stupid!
Red-Hey. Take it easy, DC.
TC-*no longer covered in grease* Oh, I thought this would happen. We’ve brought Red back from Heaven. That’s where he went when he died.
Shawn-Hahaha. No way.
Red-What’s so funny about that? It’s true.
Shawn-….oh?
Red-Yep. I went through the pearly gates.
PC99-Really? You saw Heaven? What was it like?
Red-I don’t wanna tell you…it’s kinda of a secret.
DC-Cut the crap, what was it like?
Ghost-Tell us, Red.
Garth-Ya.
Red-Ok. Ok. The streets are made of gold and there’s clouds all around. The air is fresh and there’s glowing white castles everywhere. The angels like to play cards…
Carnage-You’ve got to be joking.
Red-What? Angels like to play Poker.
TC-Haha. That’s crazy.
Red-How so?
Garth-Hey, Red. I got a question.
Red-What?
Garth-Do you feel anything when I do this. *flicks halo, it makes a metallic DING*
Red-Yes! Don’t do that!
Garth-Heh.
TC-The real questions is, now that Redsoldier’s back, my experiment was a success.
Red-Not exactly.
TC-Whataya mean?
Red-You think I came back because of your machine? Nope. I was allowed to come back to Earth from Heaven with a message.
TC-Message?
DC-A message from God?
Red-Heh. Not exactly. It’s a message from one of his speakers. It says we have to protect something. I was allowed to come back because only the all the Demon Knights can pull this off.
DC-Since when are we Heaven’s lackeys? Let them do their own work.
Red-Sorry, it doesn’t work like that. If we don’t protect this object, and it falls into the hands of the Hybrids, then Earth will be in a hell of a lotta troub-
DC-Whoa. Wait a second. Wtf are Hybrids?
Red-Didn’t I tell you guys already?
Group-No.
Red-Whoa…I don’t know why I’d forget that. It was really important and-
TC-Redsoldier!
DC-Tell us what the Hybrids are.
Red-Ok, but you’re not going to like this.
Garth-Go ahead.
PC99-Spill it, Red!
Shawn-Comon, man. Out with it!
Red-Take it easy! I’m still getting used to Earth again. Give me a moment.
DC-Take your time.
Red-Thank you. Ok. I’ll tell you about the Hybrids.
*Redsoldier stands up to tell his story.*
The Hybrids are a race of parasites. They can only survive by attaching themselves to other creatures, much like Carnage’s symbiote. Well, the Hybrids are worse. They don’t only merge with their hosts, they take over the host’s mind. Also, unlike the symbiotes we know, the Hybrids digest their hosts and then they have to find new ones. Thus it has been for a very, very long time. They’ve gone from planet to planet, devouring whole races. This has, needless to say, really pissed God off. The Hybrids are steadily extinguishing all of his creation.
DC-If he hates it, why don’t he do something about it? Huh! Why’s he need us?
Red-Let me finish!
DC-Sorry.
God can’t kill the Hybrids because he can’t stomach the means by which they have to be destroyed. To kill a Hybrid, you must kill its host first, and God doesn’t want to kill his creation. That’s where we come in. We, the Demon Knights, must defeat the Hybrids. They’ve been on Earth for a year now, searching for something known as the Pure-Form. They believe it will allow them to live without hosts, which will be very bad. The Hybrids are the same size as the bodies of the hosts they’re attached to. With no hosts, they’ll shape themselves into any form they please.
If the Hybrids find the Pure-Form, they’ll be unstoppable. They’ll no longer have to seek out hosts. They’ll become an army unlike any ever seen. They’ll have the power to march over the gates of Heaven and turn it into a playground of destruction. They’ll then march into Hell and turn Satan into a piñata. They’ll exterminate all life as we know it on Earth, then in the galaxy, then in the Universe…
DC-Oh…this is not good. *puts his fist on his forehead as if in thought.*
PC99-*starts to cry* This is terrible…
Carnage-We’ve got to stop them…we can do it…can’t we, Red?
Red-Well…no. We don’t have the power to do it.
Garth-*jumps up and walks over to Red* What are you saying? We’re f*cked? The Universe is no more?
Red-No. There is a hidden place where we can find the weaponry, and even get new power, to combat the Hybrids.
Shawn-Where? Where is this place, Red?
Red-…….Death Valley.
Shawn-Are you serious?
TC-Death Valley! That’s just great! Why the hell is it in a hot and crappy place like that?
Red-Think for a moment. If you were going to hide a source of power so great and an arsenal of ungodly weapons, wouldn’t you hide it in the most unlikely place?
Shawn-So, it’s in Death Vally, U.S.A.
Red-Correct.
Carnage-Wtf are we waiting for! Let’s go to Oregon!
DC-Nevada.
Carnage-Let’s go to Nevada!
*The Demon Knights rush out of Demon’s house and go to their houses to get their weapons and stuff to take with on the trip.*
DC-*carrying sword over shoulder*We’ll take Garth’s mini-van!
PC99-*walking with magic staff*Ya.
Garth-*sheathing sword*What?! Now wait a minute.
Carnage-*changing claws into axes, blades, and hammers over and over*Shotgun!
Shawn-*lifting bag of bombs into the back of the van*Damn.
TC-*putting his bag in the back and gives Red a bag* Here. These are your favorite dual pistols.
Red-*feeling them like it was the first time* Thanks, man. I don’t know what to say…
TC-Don’t mention it. Get in the van.
Ghost-*putting on his telekinetic helmet* Wait for me.
Carnage-*seeing him* Wtf is that?
Ghost-My telekinetic helmet. It increases the range of my telekinesis and psychic power.
Carnage-Ghost…that’s a football helmet painted black with a yellow eye on the front…
Ghost-You like it?
Carnage-*shakes head and walks to the passenger front seat*
DC-I’ll drive. I don’t need sleep.
Demon Knights-Ya. Let’s rock! W00t!
*The Demon Knights pile into Garth’s van and drive off towards Nevada, Death Valley, and their destiny…*
A few moments after the Demon Knights leave…
*A sewer lid opens up in front of Demon Child’s house and a crimson claw comes out, followed a crimson head and body. The creature that emerges has eyes similar to Carnage’s, but the creature has more muscle and has no tendrils or black lines, but is all crimson. Another distinct feature is two horns above the eyes and the fact it has no mouth. The creature is also 5’ 8”. The creature sees the broken glass from the windows of Demon’s house and makes an annoyed noise. It’s crimson skin begins to ripple and disappear as it goes inside the host’s body. The man in blue jeans and a red shirt underneath scratches his neck and starts walking down the road.*
Chapter 2
12 hours, 5 pit-stops, and 7 gas stations later, the Demon Knights arrive at Death Valley.
DC-*adjusting sword in the sheath on his back*This is my kinda place. Nice and hot.
PC99-*pulls staff out of the back of the van and walks with it* This place sucks.
Red-As that may be, the hidden place we must find is in the valley.
TC-There’s a tourist stand. Carnage, go get us a pamphlet.
Carnage-I’m on it. *runs off*
Shawn-This place is hot, I hope it don’t affect the chemicals in my bombs.
Garth-*picking up bag inside the back* What do you mean?
Shawn-Garth! That’s my bombs! Don’t shake those! *grabs bag from Garth*
Garth-Well…excuuuse me! *picks up his bag*
*Carnage walks over and picks up a book about Death Valley from the tourist stand.*
Carnage-*turning to a sleeping man in a chair* Hey. Hey. *smacks him with the book* Wake up!
Man-What!? What!? I’m up! I’m up!
Carnage-How much is this book?
Man-Holy crap! It’s a red and black monster!!
Carnage-Huh?
Man-Don’t eat me, monster! I’ll give you anything you want! Anything!
Carnage-Can I have this book for free?
Man-*jumps out of his chair and to the ground behind the stand* Aiiiiiie! It talks!
Carnage-Uh. Thanks for the book. *walks back over to the van*
DC-What’s the book say, Carnage?
Carnage-*flipping through book* Hmm…says here Death Valley is 140 miles long and up to 15 miles wide. *eyes widen*
TC-You’ve got to be f*cking kidding me.
DC-*turns to Redsoldier* How the hell are we gonna find a hidden place here?
Red-We’ll be able to find it. God said he’d give me a sign when we were close.
DC-Do you guys hear that?
Red-Hear what?
DC-That’s the sound of nothing happening…ooooh.
Garth-Heh.
Red-Don’t make fun of me, DC. I know what I’m talking about. I was in Heaven.
DC-*walks up and gets in Redsoldier’s face* I was in Hell. 500 years! A REAL sh*t hole! Why do you have to brag about Heaven every 5 seconds!? *walks off*
Red-*whispers to TC* What’s his problem?
TC-Are you forgetting something, Red? He’s a demon, a cast aside angel. He can never see the gates of Heaven again.
Red-Oh…
Garth-Comon, guys! Lighten up. We have a planet to save here. We can’t get off track.
Red-He’s right. Ok. A sign…a sign…
Carnage-*still reading book* Hey guys. Says here that Death Valley was *looks up*…declared a…wtf is that?
*Shawn and TC turn to see a police car pull up. 2 officers step out and approach Garth’s van where the Demon Knights are standing.*
DC-*walking over* What do you want?
Police Officer 1-Nice costume. You guys going to some masquerade party?
DC-*reaches for sword* Why I outta…*Carnage runs up and stops him*
Carnage-Well, actually. The demon and me on our way to a horror movie tryout.
Police Officer 2-Really? Then who are those other guys and the one in the cheap purple alien costume?
PC99-*whisper* Cheap?!
Garth-Let it go, PC.
Carnage-Those are our friends, another monster and some victims. We’re all going to the tryout.
Police Officer 1-Is that so?
DC-…yeah. So, if you’ll excuse us.
Police Officer 2-Alright. Just make sure you wear your seatbelts and have a nice day.
Carnage-Will do, nice talking to ya officer.
Police Officer 1-One last question?
Carnage-Shoot.
Police Officer 1-How do you make those stringy things on your costume move?
Carnage-Well…that’s uh…electronic. Yeah. Custom made.
Police Officer 1-Well, drive safely.
*The two police officer get back in the car and drive down the road.*
Shawn-Was that your sign, Redsoldier?
Red-It couldn’t have been…we gotta keep looking.
PC99-Cheap costume!? What a jerk!
*The police car drives not even 20 feet before it stops. The Demon Knights turn to look at it. The passanger side door opens and one of the officers is tossed to the ground. He doesn’t move. The door slams shut and the car drives up the road and takes a U-turn, coming back towards the group. The car runs over the other officer.*
DC-Holy sh*t…
TC-Something’s wrong. Get ready.
Carnage-Finally. Another fight. *turns claws into blades*
PC99-I’ll show him who’s cheap. *pulls out staff and the head glows blue.*
Garth-*unsheathes sword* I knew this would come in handy.
Red-This can’t be good. *draws his dual pistols*
*The police car drives towards the group. It barrels towards the van.*
Carnage-Uh…I don’t think he’s stopping. *starts to run*
*The Demon Knights run away from the van as the driver barrels into it and both vehicles go up in flames and explode.*
Chapter 3
Garth-MY VAN!! I ONLY HAD TWO PAYMENTS LEFT!!! SONAVABITCH!!!
DC-Wtf was that guy’s problem?
TC-At least we got everything out of there…
Garth-Damnit! They destroy the van. How the hell are we gonna get home?
Carnage-We could walk…
DC-Looks like we don’t have a choice.
Red-I just don’t get it. God told me he’d give me a sign!! WTF IS GOING ON!?
PC99-Jeez. Take a chill pill, Red.
Red-*falls to knees and looks up at the sky* Why do you mock me, oh Lord!?
Garth-Whoa. Do you guys smell that?
Shawn-Damn. *grabs nose* What reeks?!
DC-*stares at something* Holy sh*t…
*The Demon Knights turn to see a charred figure walking away from burning wreckage of the van and car.*
TC-……..uh…..
*The charred figure opens his eyes and the Demon Knights see they have no pupils, but are completely white. His eyes seem to fill up with crimson blood.*
PC99-Omg…his eyes!
*The crimson continues to flow from the man’s eyes until it covers his whole body and takes shape. A crimson monstrosity with horns above its white eyes, no mouth, and dagger-like claws takes the place of the burned officer before the Demon Knights’ eyes.*
Garth-…what the hell is that thing?
Red-It’s one of the hybrids! We’re done for!
Carnage-Nah. I got it. *turns claw into blade and swings at the creature. It blocks the razor sharp weapon with just its arm.*
Carnage-Oh sh*t. *The creature grabs Carnage by the throat, lifts him off his feet, and tosses him into 16 feet into the tourist stand.*
DC-*draws sword* You got point, Garth?
Garth-*unsheathes his sword* On it.
*The two rush at the hybrid. DC gets on the right side. Garth gets on the left side.*
DC & Garth-Shaklaha! *They swing at the throat at the same time.*
*The blades go right through it like butter, having no effect, and Demon Child and Garth fall over from the force of their swings.*
DC-Wtf is this thing made of?! *The hybrid picks him up by the throat with on hand, punches him in the gut with the other hand, lifts him up over his head, and flings him over PC99, Red, TC, and Shawn’s heads.*
Shawn-Whoa. That indin’t good…
Garth-*to hybrid* You’re the ugliest mother f*cker I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen Redsoldier naked!
*PC99, TC, and Shawn turn and stare at Redsoldier.*
Red-It’s not what you guys think! You have sick minds! You know that?
Garth-*lifts his sword up for another try at the hybrid* Comon, hojo! Show me what you g-*the hybrid’s punch sends him flying through the air.*
Garth-Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! *smacks into speed limit side* OW!!
*The hybrid starts walking towards the other Demon Knights.*
Shawn-Red! How do we fight this thing!?
Red-I dunno! I dunno!
*Just as the hybrid is a few steps away from the trio, it is hit in the back from behind and is falls face-first to the ground. Behind the hybrid, a man in a white robe holds a glowing sledgehammer.*
Man-*to the Demon Knights* Head for the road! Hurry! I can’t keep him down for lo-*the hybrid rolls over and slashes at the man with its claws, but he strikes it again with the sledgehammer, this time square in the face.* Go! Go!
Shawn-*sprints* Don’t have to tell me twice! Comon guys! *Red and PC99 run after him.*
Man-You other Demon Knights! Head for the road! *DC, Garth, and Carnage recover from their attacks and run ahead.*
*The man smacks the hybrid once more with the sledgehammer and runs to join the Demon Knights. There’s a black truck that they all pile into.*
DC-*behind the driver’s seat* Who the hell are you?
Man-I’m saving your damn lives! Now get down!
DC-What?
Man-I said get do-
*10 crimson claws come through the roof of the truck.*
Man-*to another guy in the front.* Kent! Take care of that f*cker!
Kent-I’m on it. *rolls down his passenger window and pulls a shotgun from under his seat. He leans out the window and shoots at the hybrid on the roof.* Get off you sonavabitch!
*A eerie scream is heard from outside. The Demon Knights watch as the claws retract from the top of the truck. Garth looks out the back window just in time to see the hybrid hit the asphalt.*
Twenty minutes later, the Demon Knights arrive at a small town.
*They all get out of the truck and start walking towards a small white house.*
Kent-*entering the house* This is the place.
DC-*looking around* So this is where your “headquarters”?
Man-Yes, Kent and I are the local hunters around here.
TC-You mean you actually hunt the hybrids?
Man-Hybrids? Hell, we’ve been calling them Martians.
Shawn-Hold on. You haven’t told us your names.
Man-Ok. For the record, I’m Sphere. That’s Kentarus.
Kent-You can call me Kent.
TC-What kind of name is Sphere?
Sphere-What kind of name is Tim-and-Carl?
TC-How’d you know my name?
Kent-We know all of you Demon Knights. We’ve been watching your exploits for a long time. That was some fine work you did ridding Earth of the Hierarchy.
Shawn-Thanks.
DC-Now wait a minute! Look, we’re thankful you got us out of that situation back there.
Kent-Situation? Ha! You were at the mercy of that Martian…er…hybrid! A few more seconds, and he would’ve torn you to pieces.
Red-*frantic* This is terrible! I had to wait at Death Valley for a sign that would point us to a place God told me about.
Sphere-You mean the place that would give you new powers and weapons?
Red-How did you know?
Sphere-You think you’re all high and mighty cuz you came from Heaven? Pfft. If you’re looking for weapons and power, you’ve come to the right place. I was digging around in Death Valley a few years ago and I came up with this amazing gem. I tried to chisel at it with a hammer and to my surprise it began to glow. I found out when I just tapped the little hammer against my wall, it nearly brought down my house! The gem has some kind of power amplifying abilities.
TC-Would it be possible if I could take a look at this gem?
Sphere-Follow me. It’s in the basement. *motions to other Demon Knights* All of you can come see it.
Garth-What the hell? I don’t got anything better to do.
Carnage-I wanna see it.
Shawn-Hell ya. Let’s go.
Hybrid Theory
Key
DC-Demon Child
TC-Tim-and-Carl
Shawn-ShawnManX
Garth-Garth_OneEye
PC99-Protosschick99
Ghost-Dark_Ghost3813
Chapter 1
A year has passed since the defeat of Yggdrasil and the 6 symbiotes Screech, Chaos, Mayhem, Maniac, Fury, and Terror. It’s Saturday night and the group is partying at Demon Child’s house for a change…
Garth-You’re not gonna beat me this time, DC!
DC-Give it up, Garth! You don’t have a chance of surviving this one!
Shawn-Look at Garth’s face! He’s gonna explode!
Garth-Ugh. Aw…damn! *feels his hand hit the table*
DC-Ha! Beat you! Who’s next?
PC99-*watching from a seat at the end of the table* What’s with you guys and arm wrestling? You’re all so ghetto, I swear. :D
Ghost-*reading a sci-fi magazine* Hey. I’m not ghetto. You are.
DC-Riiight. Who’s next?
Carnage-Me! *jumps down in the chair across from Demon Child*
DC-*snicker* This should be good for a laugh.
*They lock hands and slam their elbows on the table.*
Shawn-*counting* Ok. 1…2…3…GO!
*Demon Child and Carnage start arm wrestling*
DC-*smirking* You’re turning red, Carnage.
Carnage-Pffft. I’m always red, DC.
DC-*starts sweating* You can’t win. I’m a demon and you’re a smboite!
Carnage-*turns a brighter shade of red* It’s symbiote! S-y-m-b-i-o-t-e! What’s so hard about that!?
DC-*pushes Carnage’s hand closer to the table* Haha. You’re gonna lose.
Carnage-*straining* Tain’t…gonna…happen! *pushes Demon Child’s hand higher, but it comes back down*
*Carnage starts shaking*
Carnage-Ugh…er….mother…sonava!
DC-Told you! Just give up before you get hurt!
Carnage-……NEVER! *pushes harder in a last ditch effort*
*Carnage’s slimy hand slips out of grip while he tries to push DC’s hand up and smacks himself in the face. He topples over backwards in the chair and crashes on the floor.*
DC-*bursts into laughter* Hahahahahahaha. *tear*
*Everyone in the room laughs at Carnage’s accident.*
Carnage-Ha ha. Very funny. *stands up and brushes himself off with his tendrils* You owe me another round!
DC-Pffft. You wish.
*The door to Demon Child’s basement bursts open. Tim-and-Carl comes out. His face and hands are covered in grease.*
TC-*taking off goggles* I did it!
Shawn-Did what?
DC-What the hell were you doing in my basement?! I didn’t see you come in the front door.
TC-I came over a week ago and said I had to use your basement…
DC-What? I thought you left. I haven’t seen you since then!
Shawn-Hey. Hey. Comon! What did you do, Tim-and-Carl?
TC-Everyone downstairs! You gotta see this to believe it. It’s my greatest invention.
Carnage-I thought that water-powered go-cart was your greatest invention?
TC-It was…until I crashed into that old folks’ home. Remember?
Carnage-Oh yeah.
PC99-I remember that! It was horrible! Dentures and canes everywhere!
Ghost-Hehehe. That was a riot.
TC -Wasn’t it? Ok. Everyone in the basement.
DC-I swear, TC. If you messed up my basement...
*The Demon Knights all rush down the stairs to Demon Child’s basement. TC runs over to the side of a giant machine. It has a glass door and hundreds of cables hooked up to the ceiling. It constantly hums and a computer/ fax machine spits out paper with data on it.*
DC-What’s with all the cables!? No wonder the lights upstairs keep flickering!
TC-Sorry bout that. The work this machine does will be worth it. *steps over to a control panel*
Carnage-Wtf do you call this thing?
TC-I call it the Megagelic Interdimensional Kenetic Energy-converter.
Carnage-*blink*……….wtf do you call this thing?
TC-Er…I call it M.I.K.E.
Ghost-Fascinating.
PC99-That’s great, TC.
DC-I hate it. What the hell were you thinking?
TC-You don’t understand, guys! M.I.K.E. can, in theory, bring the dead back to life.
Carnage-Wow! So you mean, in theory, we could bring Julia Roberts back to life and ask her who blew her house up?
TC-…….
*Everyone stares at Carnage.*
Carnage-What?
TC-Actually, I thought we could use this thing to bring Redsoldier back to life.
*Everyone gasps*
DC-Now you’ve got my attention. Make it so, Number 1.
TC-Wait. I’m pretty sure this machine will only work ONCE, because the effects of the resurrection process will destroy all the circuits and equipment.
DC-Hmm…so this machine will only bring back 1 person and one person alone.
TC-Correct. Now, we could have a vote…
DC-Screw that! I’m the leader and I choose Redsoldier. Now get on it, greasemonkey.
TC-…Fine! *turns to the control panel and presses some buttons.* Ok. It’s begun. You might wanna run, now.
DC-What!?
TC-The machine WILL work, but the sonic boom in releases from opening the gate to the afterlife will destroy all living lifeforms within 15 feet.
DC-Ok. That’s about the size of my house.
TC-That’s my point. Now, if we could leave before the sonic boom…
Carnage-SONIC!? *runs up the basement stairs 2 at a time.*
TC-Exactly like that. Let’s go!
*The Demon Knights exit Demon Child’s house and gather on the front lawn outside.*
TC-*looking at his watch* 3…2…1…
*A huge blast of light escapes the house, and the sonic boom that follows breaks out all of Demon Child’s windows.*
DC-Damnit, TC!
TC-I might have miscalculated. My bad! *looks at his watch again.* 1…2…3…
*The light vanishes as fast as it came.*
TC-Everyone back in the house.
DC-You’re paying for those windows Tim-and-Carl!
*The Demon Knights return to the basement.*
Garth-Oh…I can’t believe my eyes.
TC-Yep. The machine’s fried beyond repair. *shakes head*
Garth-No…it’s Redsoldier! *points*
*The Demon Knights turn to see Garth pointing under the basement steps at Redsoldier.*
PC99-Red! You’re back!
Red-?enod syug uoy evah tahW
Carnage-Hehe. He’s talking funny talk.
TC-No, Carnage. I anticipated this. He’s been dead 3 years. He’s speaking backwards.
Carnage-Oh.
Shawn-I can help him. *walks over and smacks Red in the back of the head.*
Red-Hey! *pushes him* Wtf!? *comes out of the shadows under the basement steps.*
PC99-Aaaah! *covers her eyes*
DC-Oh, that’s just great. He’s nude. Carnage, pick up that box and give it to him so he can cover up.
Red-Garth!
Garth-*quickly stops looking* What?!
A few moments later, upstairs in Demon Child’s living room.
Red-Thanks for getting the clothes from my house, Carnage.
Carnage-Hey. No prob.
DC-Ok, Red. We’ve brought you up to speed. TC resurrected you with his M.I.K.E. machine.
Red-That still doesn’t explain this. *points to glowing ring above his head.*
DC-Oh…really? I didn’t notice that. I thought it was a…It’s a halo, stupid!
Red-Hey. Take it easy, DC.
TC-*no longer covered in grease* Oh, I thought this would happen. We’ve brought Red back from Heaven. That’s where he went when he died.
Shawn-Hahaha. No way.
Red-What’s so funny about that? It’s true.
Shawn-….oh?
Red-Yep. I went through the pearly gates.
PC99-Really? You saw Heaven? What was it like?
Red-I don’t wanna tell you…it’s kinda of a secret.
DC-Cut the crap, what was it like?
Ghost-Tell us, Red.
Garth-Ya.
Red-Ok. Ok. The streets are made of gold and there’s clouds all around. The air is fresh and there’s glowing white castles everywhere. The angels like to play cards…
Carnage-You’ve got to be joking.
Red-What? Angels like to play Poker.
TC-Haha. That’s crazy.
Red-How so?
Garth-Hey, Red. I got a question.
Red-What?
Garth-Do you feel anything when I do this. *flicks halo, it makes a metallic DING*
Red-Yes! Don’t do that!
Garth-Heh.
TC-The real questions is, now that Redsoldier’s back, my experiment was a success.
Red-Not exactly.
TC-Whataya mean?
Red-You think I came back because of your machine? Nope. I was allowed to come back to Earth from Heaven with a message.
TC-Message?
DC-A message from God?
Red-Heh. Not exactly. It’s a message from one of his speakers. It says we have to protect something. I was allowed to come back because only the all the Demon Knights can pull this off.
DC-Since when are we Heaven’s lackeys? Let them do their own work.
Red-Sorry, it doesn’t work like that. If we don’t protect this object, and it falls into the hands of the Hybrids, then Earth will be in a hell of a lotta troub-
DC-Whoa. Wait a second. Wtf are Hybrids?
Red-Didn’t I tell you guys already?
Group-No.
Red-Whoa…I don’t know why I’d forget that. It was really important and-
TC-Redsoldier!
DC-Tell us what the Hybrids are.
Red-Ok, but you’re not going to like this.
Garth-Go ahead.
PC99-Spill it, Red!
Shawn-Comon, man. Out with it!
Red-Take it easy! I’m still getting used to Earth again. Give me a moment.
DC-Take your time.
Red-Thank you. Ok. I’ll tell you about the Hybrids.
*Redsoldier stands up to tell his story.*
The Hybrids are a race of parasites. They can only survive by attaching themselves to other creatures, much like Carnage’s symbiote. Well, the Hybrids are worse. They don’t only merge with their hosts, they take over the host’s mind. Also, unlike the symbiotes we know, the Hybrids digest their hosts and then they have to find new ones. Thus it has been for a very, very long time. They’ve gone from planet to planet, devouring whole races. This has, needless to say, really pissed God off. The Hybrids are steadily extinguishing all of his creation.
DC-If he hates it, why don’t he do something about it? Huh! Why’s he need us?
Red-Let me finish!
DC-Sorry.
God can’t kill the Hybrids because he can’t stomach the means by which they have to be destroyed. To kill a Hybrid, you must kill its host first, and God doesn’t want to kill his creation. That’s where we come in. We, the Demon Knights, must defeat the Hybrids. They’ve been on Earth for a year now, searching for something known as the Pure-Form. They believe it will allow them to live without hosts, which will be very bad. The Hybrids are the same size as the bodies of the hosts they’re attached to. With no hosts, they’ll shape themselves into any form they please.
If the Hybrids find the Pure-Form, they’ll be unstoppable. They’ll no longer have to seek out hosts. They’ll become an army unlike any ever seen. They’ll have the power to march over the gates of Heaven and turn it into a playground of destruction. They’ll then march into Hell and turn Satan into a piñata. They’ll exterminate all life as we know it on Earth, then in the galaxy, then in the Universe…
DC-Oh…this is not good. *puts his fist on his forehead as if in thought.*
PC99-*starts to cry* This is terrible…
Carnage-We’ve got to stop them…we can do it…can’t we, Red?
Red-Well…no. We don’t have the power to do it.
Garth-*jumps up and walks over to Red* What are you saying? We’re f*cked? The Universe is no more?
Red-No. There is a hidden place where we can find the weaponry, and even get new power, to combat the Hybrids.
Shawn-Where? Where is this place, Red?
Red-…….Death Valley.
Shawn-Are you serious?
TC-Death Valley! That’s just great! Why the hell is it in a hot and crappy place like that?
Red-Think for a moment. If you were going to hide a source of power so great and an arsenal of ungodly weapons, wouldn’t you hide it in the most unlikely place?
Shawn-So, it’s in Death Vally, U.S.A.
Red-Correct.
Carnage-Wtf are we waiting for! Let’s go to Oregon!
DC-Nevada.
Carnage-Let’s go to Nevada!
*The Demon Knights rush out of Demon’s house and go to their houses to get their weapons and stuff to take with on the trip.*
DC-*carrying sword over shoulder*We’ll take Garth’s mini-van!
PC99-*walking with magic staff*Ya.
Garth-*sheathing sword*What?! Now wait a minute.
Carnage-*changing claws into axes, blades, and hammers over and over*Shotgun!
Shawn-*lifting bag of bombs into the back of the van*Damn.
TC-*putting his bag in the back and gives Red a bag* Here. These are your favorite dual pistols.
Red-*feeling them like it was the first time* Thanks, man. I don’t know what to say…
TC-Don’t mention it. Get in the van.
Ghost-*putting on his telekinetic helmet* Wait for me.
Carnage-*seeing him* Wtf is that?
Ghost-My telekinetic helmet. It increases the range of my telekinesis and psychic power.
Carnage-Ghost…that’s a football helmet painted black with a yellow eye on the front…
Ghost-You like it?
Carnage-*shakes head and walks to the passenger front seat*
DC-I’ll drive. I don’t need sleep.
Demon Knights-Ya. Let’s rock! W00t!
*The Demon Knights pile into Garth’s van and drive off towards Nevada, Death Valley, and their destiny…*
A few moments after the Demon Knights leave…
*A sewer lid opens up in front of Demon Child’s house and a crimson claw comes out, followed a crimson head and body. The creature that emerges has eyes similar to Carnage’s, but the creature has more muscle and has no tendrils or black lines, but is all crimson. Another distinct feature is two horns above the eyes and the fact it has no mouth. The creature is also 5’ 8”. The creature sees the broken glass from the windows of Demon’s house and makes an annoyed noise. It’s crimson skin begins to ripple and disappear as it goes inside the host’s body. The man in blue jeans and a red shirt underneath scratches his neck and starts walking down the road.*
Chapter 2
12 hours, 5 pit-stops, and 7 gas stations later, the Demon Knights arrive at Death Valley.
DC-*adjusting sword in the sheath on his back*This is my kinda place. Nice and hot.
PC99-*pulls staff out of the back of the van and walks with it* This place sucks.
Red-As that may be, the hidden place we must find is in the valley.
TC-There’s a tourist stand. Carnage, go get us a pamphlet.
Carnage-I’m on it. *runs off*
Shawn-This place is hot, I hope it don’t affect the chemicals in my bombs.
Garth-*picking up bag inside the back* What do you mean?
Shawn-Garth! That’s my bombs! Don’t shake those! *grabs bag from Garth*
Garth-Well…excuuuse me! *picks up his bag*
*Carnage walks over and picks up a book about Death Valley from the tourist stand.*
Carnage-*turning to a sleeping man in a chair* Hey. Hey. *smacks him with the book* Wake up!
Man-What!? What!? I’m up! I’m up!
Carnage-How much is this book?
Man-Holy crap! It’s a red and black monster!!
Carnage-Huh?
Man-Don’t eat me, monster! I’ll give you anything you want! Anything!
Carnage-Can I have this book for free?
Man-*jumps out of his chair and to the ground behind the stand* Aiiiiiie! It talks!
Carnage-Uh. Thanks for the book. *walks back over to the van*
DC-What’s the book say, Carnage?
Carnage-*flipping through book* Hmm…says here Death Valley is 140 miles long and up to 15 miles wide. *eyes widen*
TC-You’ve got to be f*cking kidding me.
DC-*turns to Redsoldier* How the hell are we gonna find a hidden place here?
Red-We’ll be able to find it. God said he’d give me a sign when we were close.
DC-Do you guys hear that?
Red-Hear what?
DC-That’s the sound of nothing happening…ooooh.
Garth-Heh.
Red-Don’t make fun of me, DC. I know what I’m talking about. I was in Heaven.
DC-*walks up and gets in Redsoldier’s face* I was in Hell. 500 years! A REAL sh*t hole! Why do you have to brag about Heaven every 5 seconds!? *walks off*
Red-*whispers to TC* What’s his problem?
TC-Are you forgetting something, Red? He’s a demon, a cast aside angel. He can never see the gates of Heaven again.
Red-Oh…
Garth-Comon, guys! Lighten up. We have a planet to save here. We can’t get off track.
Red-He’s right. Ok. A sign…a sign…
Carnage-*still reading book* Hey guys. Says here that Death Valley was *looks up*…declared a…wtf is that?
*Shawn and TC turn to see a police car pull up. 2 officers step out and approach Garth’s van where the Demon Knights are standing.*
DC-*walking over* What do you want?
Police Officer 1-Nice costume. You guys going to some masquerade party?
DC-*reaches for sword* Why I outta…*Carnage runs up and stops him*
Carnage-Well, actually. The demon and me on our way to a horror movie tryout.
Police Officer 2-Really? Then who are those other guys and the one in the cheap purple alien costume?
PC99-*whisper* Cheap?!
Garth-Let it go, PC.
Carnage-Those are our friends, another monster and some victims. We’re all going to the tryout.
Police Officer 1-Is that so?
DC-…yeah. So, if you’ll excuse us.
Police Officer 2-Alright. Just make sure you wear your seatbelts and have a nice day.
Carnage-Will do, nice talking to ya officer.
Police Officer 1-One last question?
Carnage-Shoot.
Police Officer 1-How do you make those stringy things on your costume move?
Carnage-Well…that’s uh…electronic. Yeah. Custom made.
Police Officer 1-Well, drive safely.
*The two police officer get back in the car and drive down the road.*
Shawn-Was that your sign, Redsoldier?
Red-It couldn’t have been…we gotta keep looking.
PC99-Cheap costume!? What a jerk!
*The police car drives not even 20 feet before it stops. The Demon Knights turn to look at it. The passanger side door opens and one of the officers is tossed to the ground. He doesn’t move. The door slams shut and the car drives up the road and takes a U-turn, coming back towards the group. The car runs over the other officer.*
DC-Holy sh*t…
TC-Something’s wrong. Get ready.
Carnage-Finally. Another fight. *turns claws into blades*
PC99-I’ll show him who’s cheap. *pulls out staff and the head glows blue.*
Garth-*unsheathes sword* I knew this would come in handy.
Red-This can’t be good. *draws his dual pistols*
*The police car drives towards the group. It barrels towards the van.*
Carnage-Uh…I don’t think he’s stopping. *starts to run*
*The Demon Knights run away from the van as the driver barrels into it and both vehicles go up in flames and explode.*
Chapter 3
Garth-MY VAN!! I ONLY HAD TWO PAYMENTS LEFT!!! SONAVABITCH!!!
DC-Wtf was that guy’s problem?
TC-At least we got everything out of there…
Garth-Damnit! They destroy the van. How the hell are we gonna get home?
Carnage-We could walk…
DC-Looks like we don’t have a choice.
Red-I just don’t get it. God told me he’d give me a sign!! WTF IS GOING ON!?
PC99-Jeez. Take a chill pill, Red.
Red-*falls to knees and looks up at the sky* Why do you mock me, oh Lord!?
Garth-Whoa. Do you guys smell that?
Shawn-Damn. *grabs nose* What reeks?!
DC-*stares at something* Holy sh*t…
*The Demon Knights turn to see a charred figure walking away from burning wreckage of the van and car.*
TC-……..uh…..
*The charred figure opens his eyes and the Demon Knights see they have no pupils, but are completely white. His eyes seem to fill up with crimson blood.*
PC99-Omg…his eyes!
*The crimson continues to flow from the man’s eyes until it covers his whole body and takes shape. A crimson monstrosity with horns above its white eyes, no mouth, and dagger-like claws takes the place of the burned officer before the Demon Knights’ eyes.*
Garth-…what the hell is that thing?
Red-It’s one of the hybrids! We’re done for!
Carnage-Nah. I got it. *turns claw into blade and swings at the creature. It blocks the razor sharp weapon with just its arm.*
Carnage-Oh sh*t. *The creature grabs Carnage by the throat, lifts him off his feet, and tosses him into 16 feet into the tourist stand.*
DC-*draws sword* You got point, Garth?
Garth-*unsheathes his sword* On it.
*The two rush at the hybrid. DC gets on the right side. Garth gets on the left side.*
DC & Garth-Shaklaha! *They swing at the throat at the same time.*
*The blades go right through it like butter, having no effect, and Demon Child and Garth fall over from the force of their swings.*
DC-Wtf is this thing made of?! *The hybrid picks him up by the throat with on hand, punches him in the gut with the other hand, lifts him up over his head, and flings him over PC99, Red, TC, and Shawn’s heads.*
Shawn-Whoa. That indin’t good…
Garth-*to hybrid* You’re the ugliest mother f*cker I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen Redsoldier naked!
*PC99, TC, and Shawn turn and stare at Redsoldier.*
Red-It’s not what you guys think! You have sick minds! You know that?
Garth-*lifts his sword up for another try at the hybrid* Comon, hojo! Show me what you g-*the hybrid’s punch sends him flying through the air.*
Garth-Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! *smacks into speed limit side* OW!!
*The hybrid starts walking towards the other Demon Knights.*
Shawn-Red! How do we fight this thing!?
Red-I dunno! I dunno!
*Just as the hybrid is a few steps away from the trio, it is hit in the back from behind and is falls face-first to the ground. Behind the hybrid, a man in a white robe holds a glowing sledgehammer.*
Man-*to the Demon Knights* Head for the road! Hurry! I can’t keep him down for lo-*the hybrid rolls over and slashes at the man with its claws, but he strikes it again with the sledgehammer, this time square in the face.* Go! Go!
Shawn-*sprints* Don’t have to tell me twice! Comon guys! *Red and PC99 run after him.*
Man-You other Demon Knights! Head for the road! *DC, Garth, and Carnage recover from their attacks and run ahead.*
*The man smacks the hybrid once more with the sledgehammer and runs to join the Demon Knights. There’s a black truck that they all pile into.*
DC-*behind the driver’s seat* Who the hell are you?
Man-I’m saving your damn lives! Now get down!
DC-What?
Man-I said get do-
*10 crimson claws come through the roof of the truck.*
Man-*to another guy in the front.* Kent! Take care of that f*cker!
Kent-I’m on it. *rolls down his passenger window and pulls a shotgun from under his seat. He leans out the window and shoots at the hybrid on the roof.* Get off you sonavabitch!
*A eerie scream is heard from outside. The Demon Knights watch as the claws retract from the top of the truck. Garth looks out the back window just in time to see the hybrid hit the asphalt.*
Twenty minutes later, the Demon Knights arrive at a small town.
*They all get out of the truck and start walking towards a small white house.*
Kent-*entering the house* This is the place.
DC-*looking around* So this is where your “headquarters”?
Man-Yes, Kent and I are the local hunters around here.
TC-You mean you actually hunt the hybrids?
Man-Hybrids? Hell, we’ve been calling them Martians.
Shawn-Hold on. You haven’t told us your names.
Man-Ok. For the record, I’m Sphere. That’s Kentarus.
Kent-You can call me Kent.
TC-What kind of name is Sphere?
Sphere-What kind of name is Tim-and-Carl?
TC-How’d you know my name?
Kent-We know all of you Demon Knights. We’ve been watching your exploits for a long time. That was some fine work you did ridding Earth of the Hierarchy.
Shawn-Thanks.
DC-Now wait a minute! Look, we’re thankful you got us out of that situation back there.
Kent-Situation? Ha! You were at the mercy of that Martian…er…hybrid! A few more seconds, and he would’ve torn you to pieces.
Red-*frantic* This is terrible! I had to wait at Death Valley for a sign that would point us to a place God told me about.
Sphere-You mean the place that would give you new powers and weapons?
Red-How did you know?
Sphere-You think you’re all high and mighty cuz you came from Heaven? Pfft. If you’re looking for weapons and power, you’ve come to the right place. I was digging around in Death Valley a few years ago and I came up with this amazing gem. I tried to chisel at it with a hammer and to my surprise it began to glow. I found out when I just tapped the little hammer against my wall, it nearly brought down my house! The gem has some kind of power amplifying abilities.
TC-Would it be possible if I could take a look at this gem?
Sphere-Follow me. It’s in the basement. *motions to other Demon Knights* All of you can come see it.
Garth-What the hell? I don’t got anything better to do.
Carnage-I wanna see it.
Shawn-Hell ya. Let’s go.