View Full Version : Hard Choices
It's worthless asking these but I'd still like to see the general opinion here; there are currently two girls I like and I'd like to go out with both of them, which, obviously, poses a problem.
I don't know if I should just pick one, or try dating them both one by one, or be with both of them at the same time; I know them from different places and I'm pretty sure nor they or any of their friends ever met each other.
Also: I'm in for fun with one, and a relationship with the other (know her well enough; 99% sure it could work), so if I try to date them both 1 by 1, which one shall I pick first?
Option A: Go out with the one I'm in for a serious relationship with.
Option B: First go out with the one mentioned above, then if it doesn't work go out with the other.
Option C: Date the latter for a while, leave her, then go out with the one first mentioned.
Option D: Date both at the same time until either side fails... if both sides work really well get a threesome going and win at life or something.
Magmaniac
04-17-2008, 10:33 AM
Aqo is a french maid whore.
VigilanteV
04-17-2008, 10:45 AM
A is for awsome.
anderoo
04-17-2008, 10:50 AM
Option D: Date both at the same time until either side fails... if both sides work really well get a threesome going and win at life or something.
Yeah, that's totally gonna happen.
Most of the time when people ask for advice they have already made up their mind, so why don't you just go with option A already?
No but you see I'm serious, I still haven't made up my mind. I might be asking the second girl out today, but you're all saying A, and I'm like "oh" :o
Gotta have a second opinion, I wanna hear more peeps.
Magmaniac
04-17-2008, 10:56 AM
Look, I would always go the route of the relationship. See, you could go with the 'for fun' girl hoping to go out with the first girl later, but by then she might not like you anymore.
And relationships are always more rewarding than flings, as long as you don't suck at them.
I do suck at relationships (at least those I was in so far, based on that now I'm not), and I'm pretty sure the first girl is going to like me for a while longer, we think really alike, sometimes I say things and she says it's like I'm saying exactly what she's been thinking.
While going for the one that you're "in for some fun with" seems like, well, fun. From my experiences a relationship is usually much more fulfilling. Besides, who says there won't be any fun with that choice? But I suggest that you try for the relationship first, if you put that one off it might not be there when you're ready for it.
IrishDutchman
04-17-2008, 12:03 PM
Yeah, that's totally gonna happen.
Well, it's definitely not going to happen if you don't leave your options open. Threesomes are a beautiful reward of optimism.
WarInSerbia
04-17-2008, 12:32 PM
A for winer :D
Good luck too...
Maybe some pictures of them?That would make our choise easier ;)
mranderson
04-17-2008, 1:11 PM
I voted for Option E, but actually put C so I could see the results.
Well Aqo it all really depends on your situation and the girls, which we don't know. It's not a simple yes, or no, and you have to make the decision completely for yourself. Othewise you might end up with the, "argh why did I listen to those warboardians. I could have dated that other girl ><." ;) But seriously, there are circumstances that you shouldn't tell us that would affect your decision, but you can always have fun, but you might have to wait to find another serious relationship. And you forgot to weigh in the hotness factor, but you also said you suck at relationships so... there are a few options. You can date the fun chick for a while as a practice run, cool off the relationship slowly (as in do not say I'm breaking up with you, never piss in the water that you can drink from), and than date the other chick. Also, they're will always be more girls, it's not like there is a short supply (unless you're over analytical, and critical ;)) But, the girl that you could see yourself having a serious relationship with could be understandable towards you, and actually let a relatoinship develop. Also, what are you missing out on if you decide to date one and not the other? I think the serious relationship has more to miss out on, and you can always have more fun. Than again, it is up to you. You could always date the more serious one seriously, and the one that is fun just for fun ;) It isn't as if you start dating one, and all of a sudden you are Bf and Gf. Surprisingly, girls have rules for these things :P
Plus, you are probably asking us this for a confidence booster, but now you're not sure. Go with your gut.
As for your advice, your first priority is to like yourself and be confident in your capabilities. Regardless of your relative sexual prowess, you should be happy with your choices and decisions.
Sometimes I say things and she says it's like I'm saying exactly what she's been thinking.
Hmm, that's interesting. I mean, you are from Israel right? The cultures shouldn't be too different, but ya. I refused to date a girl because she wouldn't text me complete sentences. :P But mostly from what I've seen, ditsy seems to go with hot, which I don't mind :rolleyes: But if she was thinking what you were thinking on intellectual subjects grab her while you can. But I'm guessing it was something else.
My advice? Decide what you want to do, ball up, and say, "GO GO GO!"
If you're unsure on something, post here again.
If you find yourself criticizing one of them that you are dating, take a step back and think again. It is good to look at your own flaws rather than saying they're wrong for you. Being critical is an excuse to get out of a relationship.
MatGeo
04-17-2008, 1:56 PM
If you have balls go for D. I've seen it work(except for the threesome part). :D
Modred
04-17-2008, 2:06 PM
Look, I would always go the route of the relationship. See, you could go with the 'for fun' girl hoping to go out with the first girl later, but by then she might not like you anymore.
This has bitten me in the ass more than once. Go for option A.
Kingscrab
04-17-2008, 2:31 PM
Always go with the sure bet. 99% sounds like pretty good odds.
Serban
04-17-2008, 3:01 PM
Well, I've no idea if you're the 'male' type or the 'commiting' type, but I'd suggest you take some time, think it through thoroughly and decide which one you care for the most and you could spend a happy and fulfilling time with.
SHISHKABOB
04-17-2008, 3:27 PM
Option E, kill yourself.
Just kidding :D In all seriousness go for the serious relationship. *cough* People who date other people and just play around with each other and "talk" piss me off.
/me votes A
Protogod
04-17-2008, 4:26 PM
Im the only one with common sense, apparently.
Option B, ftw.
Magmaniac
04-17-2008, 5:03 PM
Im the only one with common sense, apparently.
Option B, ftw.
I think it's pretty egotistical to say you are the only one with COMMON sense when the COMMON answer by far is the one that disagrees with you.
Protogod
04-17-2008, 5:06 PM
I think it's pretty egotistical to say you are the only one with COMMON sense when the COMMON answer by far is the one that disagrees with you.
Hardly. I am clearly right 100% of the time, and therefor all previous voters are the exception.
Magmaniac
04-17-2008, 5:08 PM
Hardly. I am clearly right 100% of the time, and therefor all previous voters are the exception.
My bad, forgot that you are infallible. I wish I was as awesome as you, protogod. :D
Ok people, more info. I just came home from work, it's 2AM. I hadn't talked for girl A for like some days already (last time we talked she said I can come visit her at her work, but it's always at a different place and time and we didn't decide on a specific date), but did talk to girl B... we talked a lot the last few days. She told me she has no plans for the holiday (yes, it's passover, starting today), and my employer told me today that after the work tomorrow (technically today, since it's 2AM) he won't have any jobs for me for the entire holiday week because he doesn't deal with passover-kosher food (reminder: I work at catering, food delivery and shit).
So it's like, I have a week of free time now, and girl who probably would date me if I asked her out, but she's not girl A who's getting most votes here. You only made my choice harder people, grr >:3
For those asking for pictures... sorry, no. That'd be unfair to them :z
They both look good, imo. Not super-models, but above average.
Hmm, that's interesting. I mean, you are from Israel right? The cultures shouldn't be too different
Actually the cultures in Israel are VERY different, the population is made entirely of immigrants, if you move to different areas in the country it's like being in two entirely separate societies; even within a single town, you can find people who are way more different than any two people you'll pick from two random countries in, say, Europe.
As far as origins go, I'm Russian, one of them is Italian and the other is apparently half-Russian or something like that :z
Eh. I say option A, assuming it works and you get anywhere. B is by far the most reasonable answer, but not necessarily going to work either, so...
Hey, it's your relationship(s?), you make up your mind.
...there are currently two boys I like and I'd like to go out with both of them...
fixed.
seriously though.. stick with the relationship one. don't be stupid.
-Neo
SHISHKABOB
04-17-2008, 10:19 PM
From his profile page.
"I'm not gay -_- I can't fall in love with men, but I can find them attractive sexually." -AqoTrooper
Go out with the fun one first. If that shit doesn't work out, then go out with the relationship one. Why? Date the fun one while it lasts, and since the relationship girl really likes you she probably won't move on for a while. Which means when the first girl finds out how much of a loser you are for posting at Warboards, you still have a second chance with the relationship girl.
Who the hell gets in a serious relationship before college anyways? It's all girly bullshit to make them feel OK about making the beast with 2 backs. Not like that shit will last once you graduate.
Jimmy_the_saint
04-17-2008, 11:09 PM
Well id have to say
have a bit of fun with girl A, then after about 2-3 weeks start a relationship with girl b.
anderoo
04-17-2008, 11:32 PM
Date the fun one while it lasts, and since the relationship girl really likes you she probably won't move on for a while. Which means when the first girl finds out how much of a loser you are for posting at Warboards, you still have a second chance with the relationship girl.
A little pwnage for every warboardian.
Maybe you should avoid making a game plan of trying out both girls in 'X' order and just go for whichever one you like more.
If it's a tie, pick the hotter one.
If you're less shallow than me, flip a coin.
Gunmonk
04-17-2008, 11:48 PM
Just be friends with them at the moment... then move one from there... Its always a good idea to marry or date your best friend... assuming its not a guy...
mranderson
04-18-2008, 12:13 AM
A little pwnage for every warboardian.
Maybe you should avoid making a game plan of trying out both girls in 'X' order and just go for whichever one you like more.
If it's a tie, pick the hotter one.
If you're less shallow than me, flip a coin.
A little pawnage for you. He likes them both, and he's a guy. We just can't make up our minds when it comes to a choice between two good things. Why can't I have COOKIES AND MILK! NOOOOOOOOO! Now you make me pick between two types of cookies!
On a more serious note...
You can like something for different reasons. You can like something for how it looks, or you can like something for how it appeals to your emotions. The old ploy of physical happiness versus mental happiness. And if you're less shallow, you could base your choice on what you believe and weigh who you really like more through hours of deep thought so that you percieve every angle (or do something realistic) :). Or flip a coin, which isn't more shallow, but less thought requiring. Still, he's already thought about it, or he wouldn't have said Girl A (the serious one) or Girl B (the fun one).
GenocideAlive
04-18-2008, 6:53 PM
I am crushed that this wouldn't make it to the "Ask Genocide" thread.
Just FYI, you should date both girls for at least a month before making any decision.
I assure you, any attempt on your part to up and decide all on your own that you're going to have a serious relationship with someone will backfire in your face. You may end up with two girls that want serious relationships, and you may end up with two girls who you thought would date you but ended up not being compatible at all. Attempting to go for bust with one based on arbitrary conditions is a hell of a gamble for literally no reason.
Be honest and move forward in both relationships. One will grow colder than the other (if not both), almost guaranteed. And if one of them can't handle you dating someone else while you're dating her, dump her. You don't need that kind of crazy controlling bullshit.
GA, I love your way of thinking. Really. I think you brought out something I had buried in me but I couldn't get out quite right.
I have to say that in the last few days, I hadn't spoken to one girl at all, while I've spoken to the other one a lot and have gotten to like her a hell lot more. Lots of things were said, and uh, out of all the options in the poll I pick none, I think I'll just go out with girl B and leave ongoing options open.
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