Corrupt a Wish!

[HyperDemonic]

Granted, you put it on a table, but theres a earthquake, and it slips off the table in to the garbage. Never to be seen agin



i wish for $9,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999.038 4592633333

[Atillawurm]

Granted But it all spontaiously combusts and is burrned off the face of the earth.

I wish I was not grounded.

[U-238]

Granted, you're airborn and smack into a building. You're then arrested for trying to be a terrorist, found guilty, and senticed to life imprisonment.

I wish I had a new hat.

[Tharisfal]

Granted it's a Half Life headcrab hat

I wish I could buy certain games but they are no where for sale near me.

[iHawk]

Granted! A new "market" comes to town and offers to sell you the games you want, just as you're purchasing them though Government Oficials shut down that branch of the Black Market and you're arrested for Software Piracy! :O

I wish I could get Christmas Gifts for all my friends/family this year! (gifts that they would like too, with no abnormal side-effects or financial damage to myself or anyone else. It must all be legal as well without me selling anything to do it.)

[HyperDemonic]

granted, but the news that you were giving gifts away to famly spread, and you found out you have 42,000,000 family members you din't know about(cuz there not really famly)




i wish for some weapons of mass destruction

[iHawk]

granted, but the news that you were giving gifts away to famly spread, and you found out you have 42,000,000 family members you din't know about(cuz there not really famly) I probably do have that many family members actually >_>

Granted, you get as many WMDs as you want, but they're all controlled by George W. Bush and they're kept in secret facilities where you can't actually see them. But you have them none-the-less, don't you feel special?

I wish I could find my favourite toque

[MidnightGladius]

Granted, but if you wear it in public, everyone will stone you because it looks terribly lame.

I wish nuclear fusion was a readily available, safe, plausible source of energy with no more and no less control/regulation as to make it readily available, safe, and plausible.

[DBCooper]

Granted, but a catalyst is discovered, and it's your flesh!

I wish I had a puppy.

[MidnightGladius]

OT: I would gladly clone myself and sacrifice the clones for the greater good of humanity, and laugh at the shocked and appalled moralists while I'm at it.

I don't feel like going twice, but I would like to say that :P

[HyperDemonic]

Granted, you get as many WMDs as you want, but they're all controlled by George W. Bush and they're kept in secret facilities where you can't actually see them. But you have them none-the-less, don't you feel special?


.... thats don't really granted it, i mean if bush controlls them, then he owns them not me


Granted, but the puppy get ran over by a 33 cars, then 5 bus,and final 8 tanks, shortly after you get it.

i wish for a rock

[psycho42b]

Granted. It is only 5 micro meters in diameter.
I wish for peace and prosperity for all time for all of mankind.

[Atillawurm]

Granted Man kind is annialated

I wish It was friday

[ShadowGonissa]

Your wish will become true in twenty-four hours. :D

I wish that I could go to Spain.

[Atillawurm]

Granted but as soon as you set foot in spain they throw you back out and ban you for life.

I wish that I had an endless supply of Green Tea.

[Tharisfal]

Granted. It's tea with harmful substances that make it green. All positive effect from the tea are halved.

I wish I could stop procrastinating and actually learn for the test thats due tomorrow.

[iHawk]

Granted, you stop procrastinating and learn as much as you possibly can in the time you have left. Hope you can learn a lot in 11.2 seconds!

I wish I could gain an imunity to the cold as well as an uncanny resistance to dangerous levels of heat.

[HyperDemonic]

granted, but for some reason this power turns off at 6:00pm to 6:10pm, wich ahppen to be the time you test your powers at the north pole naked, you die shortly after.


i wish for some 100 or so robot drones

[Yoda]

Granted, but they're all models of C-3PO. Consequently, you will have to listen to his groaning forever. :tup:

I wish that I could use the "Jedi Mind Trick"

[Atillawurm]

Granted but your head explodes form all the strain of using it.

I wish I had three pence and 45 quid.

[Protoss_Honor]

Thats money correct? Right after you get it, you trip, drop it, it rolls down a gutter and into the sewer.


I wish I had every Legend of Zelda game ever made. And that they actually worked and didnt break, and the consoles for the games worked and didnt break, and nothing bad happend when I put them in the consoles, turned on the consoles, played the games, or turned off the games.

[Atillawurm]

Granted! but you seem to have missplaced them three seconds after you get them. They will never be found again.

I wish I was a boy

[Yoda]

Granted, but you become five years old due to implications of the word "boy."

I wish I had a Super Nintendo and Mario Kart, and that it worked properly.

[raidmax]

Granted, but your super nintendo isnt compatible with your TV.

I wish i wasnt bored.

[DBCooper]

Granted. You're being chased by a zombie horde. Hey, you're not bored!

I wish I had the perfect pie.

[HyperDemonic]

granted, but before you can eat it explodes then the guy form the 6 flags pops out and starts dancing


i wish there was some one as good as me at Gears of war

[DarkMirror]

Granted. Meet my best friend, Kalen. He could pwn you in any game, especaily gears of war of halo(2).
Have fun dieing.

I wish that I had actual starcraft skills but nothing bad happened as a consequence, and that the skills are VERY usefull.

[Spartan-II]

Granted, but then they take the StarCraft servers offline.

I wish I had the power of telekinesis.

[DarkMirror]

Granted. BNut the range is so close you must be touching the thing you wish to move, and remain in contact for the whole time.

I wish that the starcraft servers went back Online, and that nothing bad happens to me or others as a consequence and that nothing happens to the server again either. also, the skills remain usefull and my broodwar CD+Starcraft CD remain completly okay and I dont lose them.

[Case_in_point]

Granted, but then Starcraft 2 comes out, and features entirely different gameplay.

I wish I had Starcraft 2.

[DBCooper]

Granted. Starcraft 2 looks like something an infant threw up.

I wish I weren't such a slob.

[Spartan-II]

Granted, but now you're OCD and obsess over the tiny details. In fact, it's so bad you have to live in a sealed bubble and loathe contact with anybody else.

I wish for unmatched skill with a guitar.

[Case_in_point]

Granted, but guitar is soon considered overrated and the xylophone becomes the new frontman instrument.

I wish I understood what the hell is going on in The Lost Room.

[DarkMirror]

Granted, but then emergence day begins right under your chair as you watch and understanding dawns.

I wish that I could keep my qoute in my signature but have my whole image at the same time.

[Yoda]

You don't have a "qoute" in your signature, consequently there's no problem. :P

I wish I could convince others to think the way I do.

[Case_in_point]

Granted, but then they can convince you to think the way they do, causing you to convince them to think the way you do, causing them to... eventually leading to head explosions.

I wish I could see a complete stranger get hit by a car.

[Yoda]

Granted - it's one of those toy cars, the same size as a matchbox. :P

I wish for the ability to cast Sith lightning.

[iHawk]

Granted, but only when completely submerged in water and during thunderstorms. It also makes your breath smell like tuna 24/7.

I wish that I could be a Ninja/Pirate/Robot/Jedi/Doctor/Psychiatrist/Janitor/Custodian/Sith/Double-Oh-Agent/Evil Mastermind/Dentist/Plumber/Ben Stiller/Super Hero/Mage at the same time of course ;) And..... GO!

[DarkMirror]

Your then assisinated by all the organisations that those titles are from when they discover that you joined other organisation.
That will be a very intersting "accident"...

Same as my last wish, I wish that I could keep my quote and my image at the same time, but have my image full sized in my sig.

[DBCooper]

Granted, but for your 1337ness, you're banned from the site

I wish it were easier to be a vegitarian.

[DarkMirror]

Granted. But since you find it so easy, you wast away on suedo-nutritues veggies that you have decided is all you need to eat.

I wish that I could be unbanned, but retain my 1337ness siggy and avy.

[iHawk]

Granted, but by removing your ban and keeping your 1337 signature Warboards crashes and AJ goes insane never to rapair Warboards again. Smooth move moron :(

I wish I could properly sing the Segata Sanshiro theme song! (Japanese Opera song ftw)

[DarkMirror]

Granted, but the other people who sing it get jealus and kill you in your sleep.

I wish That I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, but also get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it, without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment.

[Yoda]

Granted, but vandals attack your computer room with a sledgehammer. You never post on Warboards again.

I wish that I had an appearance in a Star Wars movie.

[DBCooper]

Gramted. You play as the retarded son of Jar Jar Binks!

I wish for more fish (pet fish, that is. I don't eat animals)! (rhyming FTW!)

[Flametrooper]

Granted, but the store you goes to sells you three-hundred pirahnas and you get eaten up before you can even move.

I wish I could rule the world....Muahahahahhaha!!!! (easy one to corrupt.)

[iHawk]

Granted, but you failed to specify which world so you now own a "world" that's about the size of a dime and is composed entirely of ice. This "world" of yours is in the Andromeda Galaxy and when one of the native Space-Fairing species realizes you've claimed a planet inside their space they fly their two-hundred-thousand strong battlefleet to Earth and use their extremely accurate death-ray to murder you right after making you give up claims to the planet and pay for their Travel Expenses.

I wish that Emos would just suck it up and get on with life. As part of that wish they need to realise that their lives aren't that hard and if they just pulled their heads out of their asses they'd realize that if they actually TRY to make their lives better they won't be such pathetic people. >,< (sorry, I have a sort of "thing" about Emos >_>)

[DarkMirror]

Granted, but then you become an emo and the wish dosnt apply to you.

I wish that I could reverse time to when I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment, and then put up a defence grid that wont hurt me, my friends, my family, or anyone who I dont want to get hurt to stop the robbers who destroy my computers. I also Wish that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangurus.

[Yoda]

After the computer has been enhanced so much, it decides to rebel against you. As you said, it wouldn't do anything "dangurus", but it does do something "dangerous!" ;)

I wish for the ability to use Schwitzer's account without anyone noticing.

[DarkMirror]

Granted, but it Locks down due to a extremly advanced AI sytem.

I wish that I could reverse time to when I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment, and then put up a defence grid that wont hurt me, my friends, my family, or anyone who I dont want to get hurt to stop the robbers who destroy my computers. I also Wish that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangerous, and that I can reset them to being normal computers without them gaining any power, and that they cannot harm me or anyone else.

Plus, you didnt specify what they did, so

[DBCooper]

Granted, but you lose your siggy.

I wish that I had banning powers on FFSTV.com so I could ban all those porn advert accounts.

[DarkMirror]

I wish that I could reverse time to when I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment, and then put up a defence grid that wont hurt me, my friends, my family, or anyone who I dont want to get hurt to stop the robbers who destroy my computers. I also Wish that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangerous, and that I can reset them to being normal computers without them gaining any power, and that they cannot harm me or anyone else.

Your not very observant, are you?

[Yoda]

Granted, but you lose your siggy.

I wish that I had banning powers on FFSTV.com so I could ban all those porn advert accounts.

Granted, but the morons constantly make more and more accounts and you are overwhelmed.

I wish for the ability to end world poverty.

[DBCooper]

Then why don't I just IP block them? Oh, by the way I'm an admin now. Score!

Granted. You kill all mankind, and the planet on which it resides, with a deathray and there is no more poverty... or life.

I wish that Terra was no longer a giant dust-pile. WHY YODA, WHY!!!!

[IrishDutchman]

Granted. It's a giant pile of dandruff. (what IS terra anyway, isn't it earth from WH:40k?)

I wish I farted Chanel No. 5.

[DarkMirror]

Actuly, Terra is earth. Hes refering to yoda's last corrupt.

[IrishDutchman]

Actuly, Terra is earth. Hes refering to yoda's last corrupt.

Oh, well...now it's a pile of dandruff.

[DBCooper]

I didn't want to confuse which earth I had been talking about. Because then my wish might be redirected to pluto... or something rocky...

Granted. You learn how to fart Channel No.5, but the immense amount of strain on your buttocks gives you hemmoroids, and nobody likes that.

I wish NastyApe still didn't know what Terra is.

[HyperDemonic]

especaily gears of war of halo(2).

What the hell?

Granted But he looks it up on the web, while he looks he finds a web page for a cult of people that just about the bomb the whole world, but need nastyape to do it,he signs up.


i wish i knew what Darkmirror is saying

[Yoda]

Granted.

Result: DarkMirror was not speaking when the wish was requested.

I wish that I had 250+ reputation points.

[Spartan-II]

Granted, but then WarBoards is updated again and reputation points are removed.

I wish I had a normals leep schedule again. :[

[IrishDutchman]

You do. Then you realise 'leep' isn't a word.

I wish snow wasn't cold and tasted like candy floss.

[DarkMirror]

Granted, but people then eat the ice caps since they taste so good.

Lets try this again.
I wish that I could reverse time to when I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment, and then put up a defence grid that wont hurt me, my friends, my family, or anyone who I dont want to get hurt to stop the robbers who destroy my computers. I also Wish that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangerous, and that I can reset them to being normal computers without them gaining any power, and that they cannot harm me or anyone else.

[IrishDutchman]

I also Wish that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangerous, and that I can reset them to being normal computers without them gaining any power, and that they cannot harm me or anyone else.

one wish only, buddy. That means that your computer is not indestructable, and because of an evil virus I send it, it explodes!

I wish there was a TV channel that played South Park, Family Guy and The Ali G show all day.

[Yoda]

Granted, but it's only aired in Norway. Bonne Chance :)

I wish it would snow in the area I live. (I can predict the corruption....)

[DarkMirror]

It snows so much that where you live is a thierd ice cap in amtter of hours.

I wish that I could reverse time to when I could retain my 1337ness siggy and avvy, get the skills and equipment to repair warboards and improve it without anything bad happenening or me losing the skills/equipment, and then put up a defence grid that wont hurt me, my friends, my family, or anyone who I dont want to get hurt to stop the robbers who destroy my computers, that the computers are indestructable and that they dont do anything dangerous, and that I can reset them to being normal computers without them gaining any power, and that they cannot harm me or anyone else.

[kongurous]

Granted, but you must wipe my rear end with your eyeball first.

I wish I had a magical can of Mountain Dew that was never empty and always cold and never went flat.

[Yoda]

Granted, but you become a diabetic and can't drink it. :P

I wish I had a XBox 360, without paying for it. And it worked without any problems.

[Flametrooper]

Granted, but all of a sudden, Microsoft goes bankrupt, they recall all their 360s, and because you are stubborn and keep it, they blow you and everything around you up.

I wish they would stop making cruddy videogames.

[kongurous]

Granted, but instead of cruddy, they make plain ol' bad games.

I wish I could lose more weight by playing my Wii.

[Spartan-II]

Granted, but you become morbidly obese because it makes you hungry when you play it and twinkies are the only available food item.

I wish for a pair of fuzzy (manly) slippers.

[DBCooper]

Granted. Some kind of fuzzy fungus grows on your feet. Well, it's fuzzy!

I wish the chair I was sitting in when I made this post was more comfortable.

[Zenox]

Granted but it was so comfortable you will sit on it your entire life!

I wish Whenever i wanted to eat something i'd find it right in front of me.

[DarkMirror]

Granted. But yopu suddenly develope the urge to eat Turd & douch sandwidges all the time.

Granted, but you must wipe my rear end with a your eyeball first.
Ha! Improper grammer! Therefore, your corruption is null and void!
I wish that nobody can do any further corruptions on my last wish, provided I drop it and dont wish for it anymore. So basicly, I get my wish.

[kongurous]

Ha! Improper grammer! Therefore, your corruption is null and void!

The edit button is my friend, you fucking grammar nazi.

HA! L00K 1'M PR0PERZ SPELLINZZ UR ARGAHMENT IS NOOL LOLOLOLOLOL

And as for your wish, I corrupt your wish by denying it right out. You don't get it.

I wish I didn't have to shower.

[IrishDutchman]

Granted. You never HAD to shower, you're just a smelly bastard now.

I wish my ear doesn't turn out to be damaged.

[DarkMirror]

Sure thing. It turns out to be missing.

I wish that nobody can do any further corruptions on my last wish, provided I drop it and dont wish for it anymore. So basicly, I get my wish. Oh, and kong cant corrupt this wish, and nobody can do a copy of his corruptions. That icludes copies in spirit, to.

[kongurous]

You can't create extra rules, you aren't the thread starter. You get your wish, but due to the laws of this thread, you are bound to whatever I wish you to do, and what I wish is... you stop posting that goddamn wish.

I wish I had pants.

[Flametrooper]

Granted, but when you get them, the pants are so itchy, they scrath of all of your skin and you bleed to death.

I wish people would stop putting annoying stuff in their siggys. (KONG! :P
)

[Yoda]

Granted - your mind functions differently, and consequently you no longer find them annoying.

I wish people would actually think about important issues, rather than ignoring the subject and simply believing what they want to believe.

[Zenox]

Granted. But yopu suddenly develope the urge to eat Turd & douch sandwidges all the time.


Ha! Improper grammer! Therefore, your corruption is null and void!
I wish that nobody can do any further corruptions on my last wish, provided I drop it and dont wish for it anymore. So basicly, I get my wish.


So goes to my wish!:D "yopu"?

[DBCooper]

Granted, but you can't understand what language they are speaking in.

I wish I had a working headset.

[IrishDutchman]

You do, but it's minimum volume is so loud, it makes yourears bleed.

I wish I had a bass guitar + amp.

[bobboy]

You get it right now, but it is so messed up that when you play it, it sends electrical currents through your house and kills anything within a 25 mile radius.

I wish i had a rocketlauncher that uses potatoes for ammo and can stop a tank.

[DarkMirror]

Granted. It has just abot the right firepower to stop those little Plastic toy tanks you get with armymen.

I wish that bobboy would change his siggy to something thjat wasnt a Dog humping a ballon unitl it breaks.

[bobboy]

Granted. It is a bunny.

I wish i legally had a license to kill

[DarkMirror]

Granted. But it only lets you kiill dust mites, and stripps you of the power to legaly kill anytthing else. So if you step on ONE anyt, even accedentaly, you get arrested and put to the death sentance.

I wish your last corruption was revoked.

[Yoda]

Granted, but instead the corruption is worse. You asked for his signature, but it's actually in his avatar. Consequently, you wasted a wish.

I wish I could change my end-of-school exam marks.

[U-238]

Granted however you can only lower them.

I wish Nebraska would've won the Cotton Bowl yesterday. :/

[HyperDemonic]

granted, but the other teams fan go on a gun hunt for them and they all get shot




i wish dumb pll wound stop getting DBZ facts on websites wroung.

[U-238]

Granted, DBZ completely dissapears and and there's no more facts for people to get wrong.


I wish I had a wooden ball.

[Zenox]

Granted but it turns out to be an Alien beacon u get abdocted and used in the Genetals experiments lab on their home planet.

I wish i had 4 arms.

[Fred1000000]

Granted. But....Now people think you're a freak. You can't get a job, you can't have children, and people will run from you if you try to buy anything.

I wish I was a bit more sane.

[bobboy]

Granted. However, people think you are a little TOO sane. You develop powers to talk to the dead spirits around us and they tell you about destroying the world. You try to save people by telling them. However, you get thrown into the "Happy Hotel"

I wish that i had an Elite from halo2 for an ally/ friend. With energy swords. And plasma rifles.

[TheNewMoo]

granted, but the next day master chief storms your house and kills you and the elite.

i wish that i had a 1kilogram piece of normal, edible,not mouldy,fresh, cheddar cheese that would appear in a safe place(on my table that is very sturdy with no missing legs or whatnot.)


OHO TRY TO MESS THAT UP WILL YA?

[Yoda]

Granted, but it has been already half eaten by mice.

I wish I preferred reading over playing on the computer.

[Zenox]

Granted, but u read so much that u become extremly smart so smart that u argue anyone over anything to try to prove ur point of view which will annoy people around u & finally making u live alone with no friends.

I wish i could read peoples minds.

[Serban]

Granted, but you would go insane from so much information coming all at once...

I wish Rammstein would tour in Romania...

[Fred1000000]

Granted.....But then O-ZONE trashes the party and sic's their fat Numa Numa friend on you.

I wish....I wish I could find a drummer and a bassist who were capable of playing in a band!

[Zenox]

Granted, you do find them Xept they suck worse than O-Zone 's fat friend.

I wish i can play the electric guitar.

[Fred1000000]

Granted, but sadly, you don't have one, all of the sudden. (Magic sucks, don't it?)

I wish I could meet the members of System of a Down...That'd kick.

[Zenox]

Granted, but when u meet them they just speak to u in arminian.

I wish i was superman.

[bobboy]

Granted but everything suddenly has at least 10% of kryptonite in them. And the drug is even worse!

I wish i had a zerg larva that cant over run me, also comes with 200 control and 1000000 minerals and gas each. And it can mutate. And all the offspring are loyal to me. And the government is afraid of me so they wont try anything stoopid. And....

I'll stop now.

[Zenox]

Granted, But Now the protoss are after your blood!

I wish i was always clean so i won't have to take bathes anymore,not allowing my body to developpe sensitivity to soap nor water!

Screw that one up!

[bobboy]

Granted but you are so clean that you reflect the suns light by 2000%. Now, whenever someone looks at you or you look at yourself, your eyes start bleeding.

I wish I had... umm.. im running out of ideas here.... OH I KNOW!! Clifford the big red dog! (lol) and he was friendly to me and stuff. And the governement is totally cool with it.

[CrazyTom]

Granted, but the first time you take him out for a walk, chavs will run over and steal the dog from you... "Rass, it's a f***ing massive red f***ing dog! Let's f***ing jack the bastard!"

I wish my hair was straight.

[bobboy]

Granted, but your hair falls out. Then it becomes straight. Now you are bald and have some hair that is straight.

I wish i had enough money for whatever i want. Not filthy rich, but just some more cash. Real cash, not fake.

[Zenox]

Granted , but sadely everytime you want to buy something the money turns into Chewed Bublegum.

I wish i had a clone...But he can't kill me, replace me,Fu** me, leave me, or be cooler than me.(He's a clone:P)

[Yoda]

Granted. But he's too intelligent, and decides to become you. Since he can't kill you, he cuts off both your arms and your legs and puts you in permanent life support in a hospital in Africa. However, the clone is discovered and shot by the Government. So you haven't achieved anything.

I wish I could perform lucid dreaming.

[Leosam096]

granted, but you will only see one millisecond of it.

[HyperDemonic]

..... MMMM i guess ll wish for somehting

i wish that my computer has more ram

[U-238]

Granted however you failed to specify which type of ram therefore you get Northeastern mountian rams. Have fun installing them!

I wish I had a marker.

[Subjukator]

Granted however you failed to specify which type of ram therefore you get Northeastern mountian rams. Have fun installing them!

I wish I had a marker.

granted *hands you a stick*

I wish for freshly minted, non-counterfeit, five-thousand present-day U.S. $100 dollar bills in ten stacks laying upon this spot I've marked with a yellow X.

Genie = Owned

[HyperDemonic]

granted, but it turns out you drew a red X, aww too bad

i wish for nothing

[Zenox]

Granted, you get a black Hole which is scientifically Nothing and get sucked through it into the Unknown.

I wish i was Perfect but also have friends hwo aren't geolous from my perfection. PWNED!!!

[DarkMirror]

But you didnt defend from non sequiters...So...
Granted, but then you find out that one of your "friends" is delusional and thinks hes you. So he Shoots you in the head so that theres only one "You".

[Atillawurm]

there was no wish in the last post so i will ignore it with a passion.
Granted but you discover that being perfect means that you never have time to do anything you want to do, you must strive to push the limits of your perfection you are forever donating blood, or building homeless shelters that you never get to take a break and you soon collapse and die a dried out husk that blows away in the wind.

I wish I had a pony.

[Yoda]

Granted, but it has 2 of its legs amputated.

I wish I knew how to make the right choices concerning my future.

[Leosam096]

granted. you'll know it but you won't do anything about it.

i wish i can get a new Mazda3 tomorrow without paying any cash.

[Zenox]

Granted , you get one but you have to find it.

I wish i wish i was a fish.

[UMSLdragon]

Granted.
"Honey, why did my fish just start yelling in english as i gutted it?"
"No idea honey, maybe you've had too much fish?"
"Nonsense! Fish are the best things to eat. Speaking of which, do you remember that thread about that guy wishing to be a fish. Wasn't that..." PWNED!

I wish I had a helicopter

[Zenox]

Granted but u fly in a no flying zone after u refuse to land u get shot by two sidewinders but that kills u fairly fast dont worry

i wish i had more rep. try to PWN that.

[ShadowGonissa]

So you get more rep. Big whoop. Then you spill your ice cream in the dirt. :D

I wish that Steve Irwin was still alive.

[Giggilyomeromicon]

Granted, but he's crippled and in a coma.

I wish this wasn't by 1000th post.

[kongurous]

Granted. All your posts in ceasar's (crappy) RP will be deleted.

I wish I could stop scratching my ass.

[Magmaniac]

Granted because your arms and ass have been torn off in an explosion.

I wish I had an unlimited supply of cookie dough ice cream. :-D!

[Zenox]

Granted ,you get an an unlimited supply of vomet flavoured cookie dough ice cream.

I wish i was a bit more taller.

[Magmaniac]

Granted, but you get arrested by the police for now matching the height descrition of a suspect.

I wish I didn't have to work but still got paid.

[Zenox]

Granted ,u get paid 25 cents every month.

I wish i had my diploma ,a good diploma from a prestigious university ,early so i can find a job right away.

[Magmaniac]

Granted, but after getting accepted at the university, you get hit by a car and become mentally retarded.

I wish mountain dew were free.

[Yoda]

Granted. You go to the nearest mountain and start drinking the condensed moisture. Happy? ;)

I wish I was more consciously happier.

[Leosam096]

Granted, you will think about it for the rest of your life, not thinking anything else anymore.

I wish i had some lasagna on my table.

[Zenox]

Granted ,one plate of Rancid Moldy Old Smelly lasagna coming up!

I wish no one in the world dies anymore from being killed , from a deadly disease or starvation.

[Icarus]

granted, but overpopulation occurs, and at the exact same moment, every single person in the world farts, and all organic things on earth die

I wish i wish i had a fish...

[Darmago]

granted: you HAD a fish, but you no longer do. Although you had it at one point, you never remember actually being around said fish.

I wish people would stop arguing so much.

[Icarus]

Granted, But then important questions are never answered, and cultural advances stop.

I wish my damn comp wouldn't f**k up so much!

[Bobbydeath]

Granted. Your lose your computer.

I wish no one would post below me.

[Icarus]

Granted, but... ah well DISGRANTED! MUAHAHAHA

I wish the person above me would post below me

[Darmago]

granted: but its the person above one of your previous posts and not the one that you wished this in.

I wish that 124167 would stop tandem posting.

[Zenox]

Granted but you get me doing that instead :P

I wish i never had to eat anymore yet this doesn't allow me to die from starvation ,nor make me unable to eat whenever i want to enjoy something i just want that eating stop being part of my survival.

[Darmago]

granted: but you have an exceedingly foul taste in your mouth that drives you insane.

I wish that I didn't have to go to school on wednesday

[Zenox]

Granted , but you get one additionnal year in school for every wednsday that you miss.

i wish i find the girl of my dream and it turns out she loves me and she is damage proof.

[Darmago]

granted: but she volunteered to go on the first inter-stellar voyage without you. By the time she is half way to her destination you have been long dead.

I wish that I didn't have psychology homework.

[bobboy]

You dont. But tomarrow you have 8 times that amount.

I wish i lived in a world without ugly girls with false advertising on their shirts. (Cutie shirts)

[Cyberspirit]

granted, but you will discover to your horror that all the ladies and women look very disgusting.

I wish I could get inside the mind of every person I meet.

[Zenox]

Granted ,You shrink and physically enter to live in the person's mind forever.

I wish i never had to do projects ever again without influencing my computer skills.

[Dusty]

You projects get replaced with 10 times more Essays


I wish the girl I liked was not EMO >.<

[Darmago]

granted, but she joins a convent and takes not only a vow of celibacy but one of silence

I wish I could hear out of my left ear.

[Magmaniac]

Granted, but you are now permanently blind.

I wish I had more free time.

[Icarus]

Granted, but you have so much free time, you do absolutely everything you can think of, and have nothing to do, and out of boredom, you kill yourself.

I wish everything wouldn't taste so much like chicken.

[Magmaniac]

Granted, but it's granted because you no longer have a tongue.

I wish Slipknot came out with a new CD.

[Zenox]

Granted ,but You can never afford it nor download it.

I wish i knew which girl i know is interrested in me.

[UMSLdragon]

Granted, and you wish the wish wasn't... need I say more?

I wish for peace!

[Dusty]

You get killed by angry soldiers because they lost there jobs.

I wish I was a modding Guru for SC and had a awesome lawyer so blizz could never touch me.

[bobboy]

An angry mob sticks a 12 foot long shovel up ur............ exretion device.... They are mad because you are selling your mods for unbelievable prices and give them cd's wit porn on them.

I wish i had the same box Snake used for MGS. :D! Nothing can go wrong with a box and imagination :)

[Icarus]

Granted, but there's a bomb in your box and you ASPWODE!

I wish i could sing that song "Somewhere Over The Rainbow"

[IrishDutchman]

You can, but then you get lynched by a bunch of Neo-Nazis becuase you soudns so gay.

I wish I was a 'lil sicker, so I didn't have to go to school. Nothing worse than being sick AND going to school. :(

[Zenox]

You miss going to school on days which contain field trips to Museums , fairs ,Games conventions..

I wish i could breath underwater , but not loosing the ability to breath normal air ,And oh look! I'm wearing a shark and angry fish repelling belt!:D

[Darmago]

in your underwater travels, you find yourself sucked into the intake valve of a Russian submarine

I wish I wasnt tired.

[Aquarian]

You are no longer tired, but you find yourself paralyzed for life.

I wish I could go to a Coldplay concert someday.

[UMSLdragon]

Granted, as you die the day before and your funeral procession is done on stage...

I wish I had a submarine.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but it has no hull, engine, or bathroom. Enjoy!

I wish my bathroom had a sign above it that said "The John"

[Darmago]

Granted, but it turns your bathroom into a living hell that eats all who enter.

I wish my room wasnt so messy.

[Magmaniac]

Granted, but now you can't find any of your stuff.

The person below me has a significant other.

[bobboy]

I think you are mixing up the games, magmaniac. SO... I will continue from Darmago.

Granted, but it is covered with reflective coating AND cleaned. It is so clean now that you will go blind from entering it.

I wish my saliva tasted like Coke. And it wasnt toxic. And it was the drink Coke, not the drug. And the coke-saliva production rate is normal. And i never will get tired of it.

I think that covers it.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, you never get tired of the taste of coke, but it soon does flat, which you do get tired of.

Mwahahahahahahha Flat coke FTL

I wish coke didnt go flat >_>

[ShadowGonissa]

Fine. All the gas in Coke is trapped within the liquid, so that every time you drink it, you can't digest it properly, and you can't fart or burp out the extra gas in your digestion system. G'job, buddy.

:D

I wish that Darmago would suddenly get a thousand dollars.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but he loses it immediately after.

I wish I had all seventh generation gaming consoles and couldn't lose them.

[Aquarian]

... But each one is defective and has been damaged.

I wish my hair was brown.

[Darmago]

Granted. but its only brown because it has an unknown smelly substance in it that you can't get out. The smell drives you mad the longer you are around it.

I wish I knew why ShadowGonissa wanted me to suddenly gain 1kUSD

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but you suddenly get hit by a large rock and forgot why.

I wish I could know if there were any hidden parts in the Internet.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, so you go to them all, and get all the worst viruses.

I wish my computer was not prone to viruses.

[Zenox]

Granted , but you have to format everyday.

I wish i can go throgh walls.

[Darmago]

Granted, but you are incapable of touching anything else.

I wish I would stop forgetting to do the second part of these posts.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but your responses suck and we boo you everytime, making you go Emo

I wish emo's would all just die, I mean thats what they want right?

[Leosam096]

Granted, but they also wished for emo-haters to die with them.

I wish i can sing like Josh Groban.

[Icarus]

Granted, but...you sing like josh groban hahahahahaha!

I wish i had a jar of peanuts

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but it turns out that there were cockroaches in the jar.

I wish I had the fastest Internet connection ever.

[Icarus]

(oh dear god that was gross...)

Granted, but then you lose all the fun from waiting:D

I wish my orange juice had more pulp

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but its way too much pulp and tastes way too sour, causing you to get those stupid painful bumps on your toungue which hurt when you rub them up against your gums and teeth. Yeah I went there.

I wish I never got those bumps on my toungue.

[IrishDutchman]

Granted, you don't have a tongue.

I wish I had 5 balls.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted, you have 5 balls as small as ants.

I wish I had a new defectless cellphone which I can't lose.

[Zenox]

Granted but it's got a poison filleds spikes design if you try to touch it in anyway you Die.

I wish i knew what i wanna wish for.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but you don't get your wish.

I wish I could run as fast as the Flash.

[Zenox]

Granted , but you run so fast you go to the future which would be filled with super hero hating Monkeys that are hungry for your blood.

I wish i never get cold ever again.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but you have to feel everlasting heat as hot as the sun.

I wish that I couldn't feel pain.

[Darmago]

Granted: but while chopping vegetables you end up removing half your arm without realizing it.

I wish for somthing cool

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, you get some ice... Which melts in your hand. Boohoo.

I wish I had a nice cold cup of water.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but it boils immediately.

I wish I could legally beat this guy I'm mad at.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but he wished he could skullfuck you with his gang of latino friends. (And that was in teh make my day thread :P)

I wish this stupid christian guy fad would stop.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but he wished he could skullfuck you with his gang of latino friends. (And that was in teh make my day thread :P)

I wish this stupid christian guy fad would stop.

[Darmago]

Granted, but you soon are converted to a born again Christian fanatic, who looks back upon this wish with sadness as soon as you understand the reason and the feelings for why they were doing it.

I wish that the wish of the person who posts next comes true.

[Zenox]

Granted, i wish that i die..(And here comes the twist...)Instead of dying i become incredibly Rich and Famous! :P

I wish that i had a wallet that doesn't run out of money..good legal money that is damage proof, and the wallet is magically fused with me so that it can't be robed or lost.:D

[Icarus]

Granted, but the wallet is fused deep within your buttcrack.

I wish I could speak spanish!

[Darmago]

granted, but you learn to speak it from Cthulhu and whoever hears you speak it goes instantly insane. Plus your Cthulhuian accent keeps you from understanding most other spanish speakers.

I wish that the person's wish below me goes uncorrupted.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but yours goes corrupt so mine can also be corrupted.

I wish that I could go anywhere in a second.

[Subjukator]

Granted and you will never stay still for a second. Forever.

I wish for a new Atari

[Zenox]

Granted, but you get one with no joysticks:3

I wish i could eat anything i want without getting fat.

[IrishDutchman]

You don't get fat, but all the cholestrol kills you in a matter of days.

I wish I instantly memorized anything I read.

[bobboy]

*cracks knuckles* Heh heh. You read. And you read. AND YOU READ. But there is no stopping you! Everywhere you look, nothing is new so you lose interest in everything. Meanwhile, your memory part of brain is overloading dramatically, causing your brain to grow at an amazing rate. Just like cartoons. However, unlike cartoons, your skull does not grow with your brain.

In conclusion, your head internally explodes.

I wish that i had.... hmm... a gun right in front of me. It didnt shoot unless i wanted to. It only shot when the trigger touches my skin and i pull it. I cannot lose it, it is damage resistant, it takes people and things/animals out very well, it will never rust, it shoots 9x19mm rounds but the impact is like a .50 AE round, i cannot lose it, and it cannot be broken or dropped. And it looks cool.

I think i took out the fun in this game right now :/

[Zenox]

Granted , But this perfect gun is a bait! as you reach to grab it the S.W.A.T team come crashing in and beating you to a pulp you get arrested for illegal possession of a gun even though your young but this is the new policy :3

I wish everything i wanted came true.

[Leosam096]

Granted, but it goes the same for everyone. They wished for elephants and one person wished that everyone wouldn't have to have their wishes granted anymore and then everything turns back to normal.

i wish my wishes made a little more sense.

[UMSLdragon]

Granted, but were so complex to the rest of us, they never got granted.

I wish I had more time.

[bobboy]

Granted. However, time is now frozen. And you were eating <insert most hated food here> at the time it froze. You now have to taste that for the rest of eternity!

I wish for an authentic M1911 (not A1) Hand made by John M. Browning. Pwnage if this wasnt the corrupt a wish thread.

[Zenox]

Granted, made by John Martezer Browning ...the junk man.

i wish there was no more night.

[Leosam096]

Granted, you shall heat in the sun forever more, frying you like eggs.

i wish i had some good fried eggs.

[Darmago]

granted: however they are made out of zenox

I wish I knew calculus

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but you lose knowledge of everything else.

I wish I couldn't ever die or be sick.

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, now you are placed under a boulder in the bermuda triangle for all eternity, no one will find you.

I wish I can control the wind

[Zenox]

Granted , you can control the wind from the inside of a tornado so you pick what objects pierce through you first.

I wish i could create a computer out of jelly.

[Bobbydeath]

Granted but you couldn't resist eating it so you lose it :(.

I wish I could muster the strength to talk to my crush.

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, but your heart ended up getting crushed by your crush

I wish I can get a job >_>

[Zenox]

Granted , you get a job cleaning foot fungus with your mouth that pays 5 cents a week.

i wish for the perfect female.

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, the perfect female is on the planet of shakuras, it's a Kakaru who's DNA has absolute no flaws in it.

I wish it'll stop snowing here

[Zenox]

Granted it begins to shower meteors :P

I wish i knew everybody's secrets.

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, bobbydeath thinks your sexually arousing

I wish I can ace my exams

[Zeltaris]

granted, bobbydeath thinks your sexually arousing

I wish I can ace my exams
Granted but your test papers come to life and strangle you, then shoot your balls off >_>

I wish a frozen tuna would fall from the heavens and crush my skull.

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, you were taking a drive to beach to watch the sunset with your fiance but because your brains have been crushed to mush, you two crashed into the ocean and was fed to the sharks, along with the frozen tuna.

I wish I had a life >_>

[Bobbydeath]

Granted, you had a life for about a minute then you go back to your boring one.

I wish the lazy citizens in poor countries would help out.

[Zenox]

Granted, help out with standing themselves off the couch and into the bathroom.

I wish i was an alien

[Darmago]

granted however you are stranded on earth and you don't speak any terran language nor do you understand any of the culture, plus you have no physical means of defending yourself, you are quickly dissected and coverupped.

I wish that my math teacher didn't give out so much homework.

[Zenox]

Granted, but your teacher goes pop quiz maniatic and every hour she gives you pop quizes sometimes two each day :)

I wish i can wish that the wish i'm gonna wish will be the wish i will not wish to get.

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, you can no longer say "wish" again and if you wish for something you do not want to get, you will be hit by a meteor and struck by lightning, enjoy.

I wish I understood what Zenox just wished above.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but by doing so, you realize that his wish was for you to die a horrible death, which you must grant.

I wish I had some miracle whip to put on my sandwich

[Zenox]

Granted, a miracle whip made out of Brothergreens remains.

I wish for my life to be like in starcraft :3

[IrishDutchman]

Granted, you're a critter.

I wish I had 1337 bass guitar skills

[Tharisfal]

Granted, but you spend 40 years gaining these skills.

I wish I wasn't in love with my computer.

[IrishDutchman]

Granted, you'll have to be content with a new sex-only relationship with it though.

I wish I wouldn't have to get up at 6:45 tomorrow.

[Zenox]

Granted, you have to get up at 2:48 am

I wish i never get disturbed by anything.

[Zeltaris]

Granted but your penis explodes and you don't even notice it.

I wish this wish was uncorruptible. ^_^

[Bobbydeath]

Granted, you lose it so it can't be corrupted.

I wish my wish wouldn't be touched.

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, it won't be physically touched because it's not an object, but your brain was removed so it can't make any more pointless wishes.


I wish no one can grant this wish =P.... oO

[Aquarian]

Granted, but you've just corrupted your own wish.

I wish I had a bear... A bear that shoots lasers out of its eyes and could grant me unlimited wishes.

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but it kills you. (Dumbass)

I wish I was Wolverine from XMen

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, you got addicted to saying "bring it on, bub" and you were confined in the hospital for mentally challenged for the rest of your life.

[Zenox]

No wish to corrupt?.. less work for me:D

I wish i knew what Infested_Zeratul would have wished for and wished it myself.

[DBCooper]

Well, seeing as you wished for Infested_Zeratul's wish, you cause a never-ending loop of the both of you wishing for the exact same thing. This overloads Warboards. Kongurous shows himself. He turns out to be some kind of retarded clone of Jeff Foxworthy, ProtossChick becomes a Muslim and no longer says lolz, she says lol, and, worst of all, AJ very intimately loves Linux. Now that all this has happened, intergalactic space gnomes come and bite your face off.

I wish this scenario would actually happen. I would crap myself from laughter.

[Infested_Zeratul]

No wish to corrupt?.. less work for me
The wish was that you can't see that wish :D

Granted, it happened except you became intimidated by Kongurous/MuslimProtoJeffChickxoxo and AJ's appreciation for Linux, you decide to join the retardation clan of WB and walk down the halls in a penguin suit with the label "Linux" yelling "lolxxxxx" instead of lol or lolz or rotflol or roflmfao or w/v crazy abbr you can think of.

I wish DB Cooper was in a penguin suit 5 feet below the surface of the Sahara Desert

[Zeltaris]

Granted but... uhhh... errr... your testicles grow legs and run away... with you still attached to them

I wish my spoon wasn't so big :P

[Zenox]

Granted , your head will be enlarged surgically by stuffing it with bottox lots and lots of it , but since its a form of poison you OD and pass away bleeding from every exit or entry in your body before getting blown to bits by the horrified doctors who then say:... anyone for chinese?

I wish i was immortal.

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, You are transformed into the heat energy of my fart. Energy cannot be destroyed or created

I wish I get a 90% or higher on my history exam, spoil this and I'll hafta kill you.

[Zenox]

Energy cannot be destroyed or created
What's with that? review your physics boy!
Granted, but you get 10% on everything else(see i didn't spoil it:D)

I wish for a universal remote control and i do mean UNIVERSAL!

[BrotherGreen]

Granted, but instead of your life being fun and funny (like the move was supposed to be), it turns out to be dumb, sad, and poorly dramatic (Like it actually turned out to be).

I wish I was a gangster, a straight up G.

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, you are a gangster and you are straight (lol), except you don't have a gang and two minutes later, you have cops chasing your ass of saying you were part of a gang fight in the outskirts of town where 10 of gang members from both sides were shot and died.

I wish I knew my physics

[Zeltaris]

Granted but you become a nerd-king and die a virgin.

I wish the 60's were back >_>

[Infested_Zeratul]

granted, the 60 leeches you thought was hiding under your bed when you were five has come back and are chewing away your right leg.

I wish it was 4:35 pm here and my science class was in the living room having a party for nerds.

[Zeltaris]

Granted but they rape you.

I wish everybody in this forum had a douche bag for a head :P

[Jimmy_the_saint]

Granted but that includes you. and everyone else gets used except you. when they do realise that you havent been used the see the dust on you and promtly throw you away.

I wish that the girl i like would see me the same way.

[Infested_Zeratul]

Granted, she sees you as the love of her life, but in fact she sees everyone else the same way and turns out to be a player and dates a different guy everyday. (hope didn't corrupt it too bad)

I wish the girl I like won't gasp when I tell her I do, (I never will unless someone askes me, excluding you peeps >_>)

[Jimmy_the_saint]

Granted but she normally has to gasp to breathe and because you wished her not to she dies because of you. Well done.

I wish that i had a non-corrupt mp3