Hope this is the place for Fan Fics...

[Half-Dragon]

I wrote a Fan Fic and would like some feedback, positive or negative. Thanks everyone, no matter what you think:
http://www.hellgateguru.com/fanfic-tbotb01.php

[GenocideAlive]

You're trying too hard to convey emotions of characters instead of letting characters convey their emotions. There's something called "deus ex" which long story short means you can tell someone is authoring this story due to the way that the plot/characters/etc seem as though they're forced along.

Anyway, I may write some kind of guide to help people along.